b3ta.com user Spoon
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Profile for Spoon:
Profile Info:

sorry, all my pictures have gone and died. i should have watered them more often

Recent front page messages:

benny wasn't looking forward

to his first day at big school
(Mon 18th Aug 2003, 23:16, More)

roger put on a brave face

but in reality he was very timid
(Thu 17th Apr 2003, 20:50, More)

quick 'n crappy

(Fri 20th Dec 2002, 11:41, More)

on a cowboy theme

(Wed 4th Dec 2002, 10:56, More)

show off

(Tue 24th Sep 2002, 23:59, More)

he did you know

(Sun 26th May 2002, 0:11, More)


(Fri 10th May 2002, 12:51, More)


(Wed 8th May 2002, 17:24, More)


(Tue 7th May 2002, 23:06, More)

Things are hotting up now

on centre court
(Tue 7th May 2002, 14:33, More)

buy 20

and die on the toilet free
(Fri 3rd May 2002, 14:37, More)

Well I never!

(Tue 23rd Apr 2002, 15:46, More)

your mother

sucks cuntymints in hell
(Tue 23rd Apr 2002, 12:24, More)

don't worry queen m

we will get to the front page
(Fri 19th Apr 2002, 20:18, More)


front page here we come
(Fri 19th Apr 2002, 19:56, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Worst Record Ever

i bought that 'one week' single by
the bare naked. i don't know what the fuck i was on.
when i realised my mistake i burnt the cd in the oven. it smelt really bad.
(Tue 2nd Dec 2003, 17:36, More)

» People with Stupid Names

my mum taught a lad called
Everard Dick. He was reasonably well known around aylesbury and I think he had a modest athletics career.

His sister has the even more fantastic name Ophelia Dick
(Fri 27th Aug 2004, 10:55, More)

» Foot in Mouth Syndrome

slightly similar to wbm's dead parents tale
i was round a friends house and there were some people there i knew vaguely. as i left, for some reason i said 'have a good mother's day' to the room (as the hallmark holiday was a couple of days away). immediately on saying this i realised one of the people there had lost their mother unexpectedly and at a fairly young young age only a few days previously.

many years ago when my sister was a toddler she was in the back seat of the car next to a rather hirsute female family friend. so she very loudly and clearly asked 'mummy, why does helen have a moustache?'

(edit) spookily wbm's alcoholic story has just reminded me that the other evening while having dinner i was banging on about this alcoholic twat who used to drink in a pub i worked at and what a cunt he was. it was some time before i remembered that my housemate's brother is a recovering alky.
(Thu 22nd Apr 2004, 19:36, More)

» Lies Your Parents Told You

my housemate's son
knocked a tv over and it stopped working. it got repaired and we had a bill made out with the kid's name on, and all pretended that he would have to give up his pocket money to pay it. he seemed to be joining in the joke until he burst in to tears, thinking he'd be paying off the tv bill for the next five years. hehe
(Wed 14th Jan 2004, 17:37, More)

» Clients Are Stupid

i spent some time yesterday
patiently expalining to a friend of my parents how to upload files to some webspace i had set up for her. after explaining how to put the ftp address in to explorer and what the username and password should be, and telling her the index.html needed to go in the htdocs folder, she asks:
'so how do i make a web page?'

i should have seen it coming really
(Tue 30th Dec 2003, 14:25, More)
[read all their answers]