b3ta.com user Richard_O'Richard
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» Have you ever been rude to a celebrity?

Not my anecdote, but...
Last year I went to a debate where one of the speakers was the entertainment editor (or something) of the BBC. Someone whose self-perceived importance massively outweighed her real importance anyway (I asked for her autograph just because I felt sorry for her, and she signed her name right over the top of John from Big Brother's!). Sitting in the Mitre pub in Cambridge afterwards, I asked Tom what he had been talking to her about all evening. "Well," he says, "she was asking me what programmes I watched on TV, so I said Neighbors, and then I realised I could ask her something that has been on my mind for a while."

"What was that?"

"Whether Harold from Neighbors is a cunt"

"What???"

"Oh, well, my friend Steve went to see a panto last year and the guy who plays Harold was in it. So Steve queues up backstage after the panto to get Harold's autograph, and Harold is signing away at some kid's programme when someone shouts from the back 'why are you so fat?'. And Harold stops and looks up, and he says 'because every time I shag your mother she gives me a biscuit'.

"I just don't believe that someone who was in the salvation army, even if only fictiously, would say that".

But apparently the BBC woman said that Harold is a nice guy.
(Wed 14th Apr 2004, 23:46, More)

» Stuff You've Overheard

Fizz, pop, woof
I was queing up to pay in my college rent cheque in Lent term and overheard the Senior Tutor telling a guest an anecdote as he walked past.

I can't imagine what it was about, except that it ended with "..and then the dog *choked* on the champagne cork!" and then the two of them laughing uproariously.
(Thu 10th Jun 2004, 3:19, More)