» Scary Neighbours

sex crazed old people
I live in Edinburgh. I used to live in a dogey part of the city by the sea. My neighbours were the most senile, nosey geriatrics that I have ever met. They had a bloody big dog that would rip your throat out soon as look at you (in fact it attacked the old woman taking a large chunk of her leg for his dinner) She called me "sonny" even though i'm a girl and being abusive. They were in their eighties.

They used to have the loudest, filth ridden sex my ears have ever heard. But thats not all, oh no. In order to keep time pumping the night away, he used to sing "Flower of Scotland" at the highest volume possible.

I hated to hear our national anthem used in this way and the grunting and singing made me go slightly mad.

So I would bang on the wall out of time to his stroke to put him off.

It was a fantastic game, me banging on the wall, him stopping, shouting "fucking hell!" at the top of his voice then trying to start up again.

The amount of KY they must have went through is unthinkable.
(Thu 25th Aug 2005, 16:30, More)