» Local Nutters

Do spacks class as nutters?
I follow the 'SPECIAL BUS' on the way into work in my van, with its average cabbage laden speed of about 15-20mph I try and overtake at any given chance. I have noticed for some time before some spacker wearing a crash helmet, and normally observe him whacking his head on the window.
Come one day I see same spacker smacking his head on the window and suddenly the window falls from the bus and smashes! spacker then throws up all outside window all over a group of chavs! who were pissing themselves laughing as the Spack carrier stops to let someone off who was having a spack attack. Wiped the smiles off their scumbag faces...
(Thu 16th Sep 2004, 16:27, More)

» Petty Sabotage

Sabotage?
I found out that one of the chav scum who stole my car also drove, a clapped out escort similar to mine, As I knew my car inside out, I knew that with a little jiggling around under the car, I could 'pop' the bonnett open. Similar engine, half cut the cambelt, Jammed the carburettor butterflies open so when it starts it justs revs higher and higher and higher... Plus draining his sump and filling the sump with petrol/wallpaper paste mix. Apparantly the explosion gave him 1st degree burns. Serves the cunt right... He still nicks cars... and he'll get whats coming to him... AGAIN
(Mon 9th May 2005, 23:40, More)

» Look! It's me in the Local Paper

I hit the rag about 4 years ago,
In my vandalism years, removing fuses from lamposts... blacking out entire areas as the covers for the lamposts just lifted off... We (friend and I) were referred to as a group of senseless individuals who were intent on shattering the security in the community.

The council eventually shattered our reign of darkness of 4 weeks by replacing every lapost in our area with new ones, ones that I cant remove the covers, wven when pissed...



Length and Girth?
You love it really!
(Thu 10th Feb 2005, 11:47, More)

» Near Death Experiences

One of my
'strange' Hobbies Is Visiting quarries and mucking around on the machinery thats left there, You know those BIG UGE belts that go from the ground to about 70 foot up into the air? Or in this case to a Crusher.. (8 foot plates of Titanium) Been up there plenty of times to know whats in it and how it works... So as a dare one day I get the pleasure of climbing up one of these belts, INSIDE! which is about a foot tall, Me being a lanky bastard can just about fit inside. My mate in the meantime has found the electrical room and somehow restored all power to the remaining equipment that was left on the quarry! Some twunt had switched the conveyor and the crusher on (me when I was cocking around in the control room) and I found myself being shifted at a slow rate, but I was shitting myself as I could hear a thump, thump THUMP THUMP! THUMP!! - you get the picture, I was on my way to certain death by crusher.... With me yelling between the thumps of my soon to be grave... My mate heard me and knocked the power off! Safe? nope, the belt and crusher kept going, but slower and slower, It was about 1 foot away from the top when I finally stopped and bricking myself Shot out of the belt to a rusty gantry, which gave way seconds later! landed in a big Dust pit 6 foot down! 2 near death expieriences there and we still fuck about in there! Penhow Quarry If your interested... Frequent Summer camping trips there every year.
(Fri 26th Nov 2004, 19:38, More)

» World's Most Hated Food

KEBABS!!!!!!!! Bleurch!
the very scent of such a foul processed meat product makes me want to create a pavement mosaic!
*runs and throws up*
(Mon 12th Jul 2004, 16:00, More)