b3ta.com user Captain Togo: the problem with heroin is its just so moreish
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» Local Nutters

My dear friend John.
A local loon not far from here has earned himself the name "Gizafag John"(John, my dear, could I trouble you for a cancer stick, old boy? is the rough translation)

I dont even know if his name is John to begin with, but as it happens, he gets ever so slightly fucked off if you run up to him shout "GIZAFAG, JOHN!" and run away again. He chases you for bloody miles the nasty old codger.

Another one is Don the Tramp. Don lives in some abandoned playing field changing rooms called "The Pavillion" If you go within 300 feet of his accomidation he throws broken pieces of toilet at you. Trouble is, I have to walk less than 30 feet from his humble abode to get to college. I saw a knife fly past once, I swear to god.

Apologies for length, girth and circumference.
(Sat 18th Sep 2004, 16:00, More)

» Evidence that you're getting old

I recently discovered a number of highly worrying things.
1) I am getting grey hair.
2) I am going bald.
3) I have developed arthritis in my guitar fretting hand(that one was a shot to the heart)
4) I make noises when I bend down.
5) My knees creak and pop at any given moment, when I walk down the street it sounds like I'm walking on a bag of crisps.

And most worrying of all?

I'm only 17. :(
(Sun 31st Oct 2004, 19:46, More)