b3ta.com user Magical HellBunny
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I like stuff. Insightful, I know. :)

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» My Worst Date

I disowned him after this (Also my first post...please don't hurt me!)
I had been seeing this one guy for quite a while, don't know why. Anyway, his cousin got him a big, green, nasty NBA Boston Celtics coa for Christmas. It was damn near the ugliest thing I had ever seen. A few days after Christmas, the boyfriend insisted that he take me somewhere special. This was a big deal for me since we pretty much stopped going places. I went crazy getting all dressed up and I was really excited.

We were going to a nice restaurant in an upscale part of town. We park the car and [cue the shocked music] he pulls out the nasty green coat from the back seat. He puts it on and stuffs something in his coat pocket. Did I mention that I hated this coat? We walk the 1 block to the restaurant from the parking lot. He's parading around in this coat like it's the greatest thing.

Once the coat came off at the restaurant I stopped avoiding him. When we left, he puts the coat back on and pulls out the thing he stuffed in his pocket. It was a black stocking cap. It was one of those condom-looking hats. I was mortified. People were staring at him. He looked like a child molester! (Especially with his glasses and the old-man style pants he was wearing) I walked a few feet behind him and pretended I was alone. After spending the rest of the night being watched by people in the places we stopped at along our walk through the town, he finally asked me why I was avoiding him. Normally, I'm not so harsh with people, but he had to know the truth. I said he looked like a child molester and people were staring suspiciously at us. Ouch.

Sorry about the length. :)
(Sat 23rd Oct 2004, 23:18, More)

» Petty Sabotage

Sleepless until now...apologies for 'tis long.
I used to share a room with a girl who had a bad habit of bringing her boyfriend over at random times, always unnanounced. I kindly asked her to let me know ahead of time so I could find somewhere else to go as I didn't want to interrupt their constant fucking. She snapped off on me saying that I shouldn't be telling her what to do and shit like that. Well, after that I gave up being polite. I decided that if she wasn't going to be even the slightest bit courteous like that, she wasn't going to get any action. (Cue evil giggling....now.) I already had insomnia from her and her boyfriend's antics so I decided to use that as my weapon of choice. I stayed up all day, all night, all weekend. I never left the room, except for a drink and a snack from time to time. I was never gone long. This went on for about 3 weeks before he realized that he was going to be a little, um, frustrated for a few days. By week 3 he lasted about 45 minutes before he took a flying leap out of the lofted bed, smacking his head on the ceiling, grabbed his pants and headed out the door, never to be seen in the room again.

Also, before I left for home at the end of the term, I "forgot" to take out her nasty, food-ridden trash. I believe there was some old seafood salad in there, or maybe a tuna tin...I think I forgot to cap the jar of mayonnaise in the unplugged fridge (after I smeared it and some tuna salad on the wall behind her sofa...) I can't imagine what that had to have been like after being in a closed-up room for 4-5 weeks.
(Thu 5th May 2005, 19:17, More)

» Guilty Pleasures

candy sensation
I like to peel the chocolate coating off of candy bars and eat it first. Then I mush up the middle and eat that. Oddly enough, I find myself doing this at work in a most absent-minded fashion. I get funny looks from coworkers. I tell them I'm special and my lil' bus is parked around back.
(Sun 10th Apr 2005, 8:06, More)

» The last thing that made me cry

a small rodent
About 3 weeks ago I lost my guinea pig after he had surgery to remove a bladder stone. Mourned the little guy for 2 days. Poor thing. *sniff* *sniff*
(Fri 15th Apr 2005, 21:57, More)

» Guilty Pleasures

Not me, but someone I know...
One of my friends enjoys peeling the dead skin off her feet and offering it to people nearby. Makes me wonder just exactly *what* kind of people I associate with...
(Wed 13th Apr 2005, 18:47, More)
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