b3ta.com user monstermunchqueen
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» My sex misconceptions

Not exactly sex but genital related...
I used to think boys wee-ed out of their finger tips because whenever you saw them they had their hands in front of them with wee gushing out.
I'm now a biology teacher!
(Sat 27th Sep 2008, 20:12, More)

» Hidden Treasure

possibly a military spying type thing??
a few years ago I could hear a rattling noise in my head, now i know what you're thinking and no it wansnt my brain, anyhoo i could feel something loose in my ear so after much digging i managed to pull out this mass of greeny waxy stuff, i cracked it open and found this small plastic thing inside, i phoned my doctor and he said not to worry it was probably a gromit that would have been put in when i was younger to help me hear but then he said...but you have never had gromits... wwwwwwooooooaaaaahhhhhh
i think the government had been using me to spy and stuff, it would explain why i assasinated all those world leaders oh well
no apologies... the fbi may be listening
(Sun 3rd Jul 2005, 18:04, More)

» Look! It's me in the Local Paper

Not me But..
An ex of mine, got into the local papers and the sun (woo hoo)he won a free bag of crisps in one of those walkers blue packet thingies, anyhoo, he thought it wud be funny to replace the free bag of crisps with a token saying the finder had won £10,000, Can you see where this is going!! he worked at the tuck shop in school and after he and his accomplises carefully resealed the packets he sold them at lunchtime, some poor bastard first year found the pack and starts going mental! the school lock the 'winning' ticket in the school safe and the boys parents were called, big hoo har, even bigger when it was realised that it was a hoax!
(Mon 14th Feb 2005, 13:08, More)

» Urban Legends

Tom Jones
I heard this as a joke years ago but repeated it as gospel truth to a friend who believed it and repeated it to everyone on her course

I told he that Tom Jones is now unfortunatly too old to do his gyrating bending the knees dancy thing but he didnt want to disappoint his fans so before each show he is attached to a fly wheel behind him and when he wants to dance they switch on the wheel which makes old snake hips shake his thang

(Sat 7th Jan 2006, 11:33, More)

» Join us... come join the cult

Join me
yeah i'm in join me, its def not a cult its a collective...this 'good' friday i'm taking chelsea buns into work for everyone!
(Thu 26th Jan 2006, 19:42, More)
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