b3ta.com user Cosmopolitan Steve
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I'm one of them student types from Scotland.

Contrary to the above vector art self portrait, I am not just a disembodied head.

You can see some of my flatmates getting up to all sorts of drunken shenanigans involving Buckfast, anal discharge and Pi at my website.

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Best answers to questions:

» I was drunk when I bought this

The next Justin Timberlake
When the student loans come in I have a nasty tendency to get drunk at this one pub which does all drinks for a pound, which also happens to be right in the middle of all the shops. A couple of years ago I decided to buy a Trilby on the drunken logic that birds want to shag that Justin Timberlake twat and he wears a Trilby, so I should get one too. Never buy clothes when blind drunk because you can't see how they look. The hat that I bought was so small it wouldn't fit on my head. I also bought a digital video camera once but it then got stolen by some Maoris in New Zealand.
(Thu 9th Jun 2005, 13:27, More)

» When animals attack...

The Rat of Zorro
My flatmate keeps his pet rat in a fish tank about 5 feet from his bed on top of a chest of drawers. While my flatmate lies in bed 'reading' (so he tells us) the rat leaps for the Scotland flag pinned to the wall, swings on it like some swashbuckling hero and lands face to face with my flatmate.

So it's not really an attack, but an acting career in a future Three Musketeers remake surely awaits.
(Fri 3rd Jun 2005, 22:02, More)