b3ta.com user in vino veritas
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Mr horrible did a painting of me. He is not at all horrible :D

I'm a 27 28 29 oh god 30 ridiculously ancient 31 32 year old idiot living in Lancashire, married with a daughter called Evelyn. I bite my fingernails and like cheese.

I have a website that I haven't updated for ages - click on the picture :)

Also please feel free to have a look at my photos on Flickr

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My very first picture post - it is a Gruffalo Soldier :-)

Evelyn (again)

Me by Me

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Me as Carrie Ann Moss, courtesy of the lovely Mugatu (thanks Gareth!)

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Me in GMoS's hat in a whirlpool by Curis (thanks :-))

Rappola made a lovely jiggling wine bottle for me - it's brilliant!

Me (photoshopped by Occulus)

A random fantasy by Cheeky Boy! Thank you James :-)

And the adorable Zoot Cadillac did this beautiful interpretation of me in a fez. Hurrah for him!

What a nice chap that frunt is - look, he drawded me!

That lully MC Quirkafleeg got all creative and drew me too. I am envious of his obvious talent!

The amazingly gorgeous Top Up The Tea made this amazingly gorgeous picture of me looking at cake. Hurrah for her! Cheers Kate :)

Look at the two pictures lovely Chunderbunny made - he am lully!

Kingsuperspecial made this lovely picture from his b3tans series. Yay for him!

Look what the lully DTH did draw! *Big huggles* to him!

That gorgeous Jessie made me a TWO pictures - isn't she great?

And P3te made me this beautiful (and extremely flattering) picture!

Hurrah! Happytoast zombified me :)

That wonderful mofaha vectored me pretending to be Stephanie from Lazy Town! Yay!

Gorgeous Killer Kitti drew me and Evelyn. Hurrah! Thanks Athena :)

Laird Dave Draws Dave Drawed me. Yay!

I've been kidnapped into Fluffy Elephants' circus! Eep!

But it's OK, she wrote me a lully pome too:
Dear in vino veritas
You are so grand
I want to be with you
to just hold your hand

Because you are so pretty
And you are so smart
So I wrote you this poem
From the depths of my heart.

I am a SexBarnacle on Captain Wow's ship, the Pearl Necklace - woo!

What kind of pirate am I? You decide!
You can also view a breakdown of results or put one of these on your own page!
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey

I am nerdier than 77% of all people. Are you nerdier? Click here to find out!

What Flavour Are You? I am Chocolate Flavoured.I am Chocolate Flavoured.

I am sweet and a little bit naughty. I am one of the few clinically proven aphrodisiacs. Sometimes I can seem a little hard, but show warmth and I soon melt. What Flavour Are You?

(Actually I was tea (or vanilla if pushed), but that was boring)

You Are Not Scary

Not Scary!

Everyone loves you. Isn't that sweet?

How scary are you?

You are cnn.com	You like to tell people what's going on in the world.  People accuse you of being biased.  You have a deep voice.
Which Website are You?

You are Windows 98.  You're a bit flaky, but well-liked.  You don't have a great memory, but everyone seems to know you.  A great person to hang out with and play some games.
Which OS are You?

You are alice kobe.  You are the wife of late Brigadier - Gen. Maxwell Kobe former ECOMOG ARMY COMMANDER in Sierra Leone.  You have suffered hardship and maltreatment in the hands of your husbands family.  You have $25.5 million to share.
Which Nigerian spammer are You?

You Are 24 Years Old


Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

What Your Underwear Says About You

You like to think of yourself as innocent, even though you're not!

You're comfortable in your own skin - and don't care to impress anyone.
The Underwear Oracle

Your Birthdate: November 23

With a birthday on the 23rd of the month (5 energy) you are inclined to work well with people and enjoy them.

You are talented and versatile, very good at presenting ideas.

You may have a tendency to get itchy feet at times and need change and travel.

You tend to be very progressive, imaginative and adaptable.

Your mind is quick, clever and analytical.

A restlessness in your nature may make you a bit impatient and easily bored with routine.

You may have a tendency to shirk responsibility.

Very sociable, you make friends easily and you are an excellent traveling companion.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?


Please excuse my manner -- I am not used to... society.
You are Ichabod Crane. You're far ahead of your

time, and are looked at strangely as a

result. You have a great deal of faith in

science and rationality, which makes it a wee

bit difficult for you to accept the idea of a

headless ghost from hell, but you manage.

Despite the fact that you faint often and

can't be in the same room as a spider, you

posses the courage to face the truth wherever

it lies. Just, uh... bring a lantern or two


Which Johnny Depp are You?
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My life has been rated:
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Created by Bart King

What Meg and Mog Character Are You?

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Recent front page messages:

Oh noes!
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(Fri 21st Oct 2005, 21:01, More)

Best answers to questions:

» That's when I knew it was over...

I had been married for three months
and had spent a hard day at the lab and was arriving home to get ready to go out for an evening working at my second job.

I had asked my jobless husband on leaving the house at 8.30am to hang out the washing.

At 5pm nothing in the house was different except an empty bowl of cereal on the coffee table and unwashed husband playing Doom on the computer.

"You didn't hang the washing out. Why not?"

"What do you expect woman? I only got up an hour ago! Give me a chance! But you're home now, why don't you do it?"

THAT is when I knew it was over.

Apologies for the lack of humour.
(Thu 21st Jul 2005, 11:18, More)

» Your Weirdest Teacher

Mrs Mould
One of my junior school teachers was called Mrs Mould and she was a lovely, kind teacher.

She had a box with dried run-over frogs in that she would periodically bring out to show the class. All the dead amphibians were flat and hard with varying rictuses of agony on their little froggy faces.

My particular favourite was one that had been run over by a bicycle. Great facial expression.
(Sun 13th Nov 2005, 14:35, More)

» It's not me, it's the drugs talking

Whilst under the influence
I believed that The Matrix made sense and so did the wallpaper.
(Fri 16th Dec 2005, 19:08, More)

» Weird Traditions

While on holiday
whenever a bench is spotted, the first person to see it has to shout "A species of bench!"

Can't remember why.
(Thu 28th Jul 2005, 21:03, More)

» Strict Parents

I was banned from having my ears pierced until I was 16
But when I got to 16, my 14 year old sister whined so much she got hers done at the same time.

I was outraged.

Strict, but only up to a point.

Oh and no chewing gum or bubblegum or ITV. Middle class, you see.
(Thu 8th Mar 2007, 13:29, More)
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