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- a member for 18 years, 10 months and 8 days
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» Other people's diaries
Shame on you, mum!
Snooping around my younger sister's room one day, I happened across her diary... To be fair, I decided if she hadn't wanted anyone to read it, she wouldn't have left it on her bed with the legend MY DIARY emblazoned across it.
To my relief (and slight disappointment), my sister was a very young and innocent 14 year old, somewhat naive and a TERRIBLE writer. The pages were littered with wistful longings and tired cliches regarding the various objects of her affection - standard teenaged unrequited love stuff.
I jumped guiltily as I heard the front door bang, and thinking my sister was home I hurriedly tried to put the diary back exactly as I had found it, whilst thinking up an excuse for being in her room. As I sauntered down the stairs, my face struggling to maintain its expression of nonchalance, a wave of relief washed over me as I met my mum at the foot of the stairs. A sudden urge to confess and repent quickly followed (lapsed catholic, you see) -
"I've just been reading Holly's diary" I blurted out conspiritorially.
"Yeah, it's crap, isn't it?" my mum replied, without batting an eyelid.
Thank GOD I never kept a diary.
(Fri 2nd Feb 2007, 11:32, More)
Shame on you, mum!
Snooping around my younger sister's room one day, I happened across her diary... To be fair, I decided if she hadn't wanted anyone to read it, she wouldn't have left it on her bed with the legend MY DIARY emblazoned across it.
To my relief (and slight disappointment), my sister was a very young and innocent 14 year old, somewhat naive and a TERRIBLE writer. The pages were littered with wistful longings and tired cliches regarding the various objects of her affection - standard teenaged unrequited love stuff.
I jumped guiltily as I heard the front door bang, and thinking my sister was home I hurriedly tried to put the diary back exactly as I had found it, whilst thinking up an excuse for being in her room. As I sauntered down the stairs, my face struggling to maintain its expression of nonchalance, a wave of relief washed over me as I met my mum at the foot of the stairs. A sudden urge to confess and repent quickly followed (lapsed catholic, you see) -
"I've just been reading Holly's diary" I blurted out conspiritorially.
"Yeah, it's crap, isn't it?" my mum replied, without batting an eyelid.
Thank GOD I never kept a diary.
(Fri 2nd Feb 2007, 11:32, More)
» Accidental innuendo
Why didn't I just go for Diamonds?
It was my parents 30th Wedding anniversary recently, which after some quick googling, I ascertained was "Pearl"*. As I live near Brighton, I decided to head down & see what the jewellery shops in the Lanes had to offer - I think you can see where this is going.
My boyfriend, being the Macaddict that he is insisted on going to w@nk over all the lovely shiny toys in the local Cancom first. It was a fairly quiet day, the only other people in the shop being the 2 salesmen & a couple of male customers. An air of hushed awe surrounded us, as the men all reverently wandered amidst the pristine white products, when I cleared my throat and issued the immortal proclaimation (a little louder than intended)
"Right then - pearl necklace time"
I ended up buying them a Toblerone.
(*Apparently they've upgraded it to Diamonds in the 'Contemporary' list, but seeing as that may as well be called the 'Cynical Ploy To Get You All Spending More Money' list, I decided that they could wait until 60 like everyone else.)
(Fri 13th Jun 2008, 10:55, More)
Why didn't I just go for Diamonds?
It was my parents 30th Wedding anniversary recently, which after some quick googling, I ascertained was "Pearl"*. As I live near Brighton, I decided to head down & see what the jewellery shops in the Lanes had to offer - I think you can see where this is going.
My boyfriend, being the Macaddict that he is insisted on going to w@nk over all the lovely shiny toys in the local Cancom first. It was a fairly quiet day, the only other people in the shop being the 2 salesmen & a couple of male customers. An air of hushed awe surrounded us, as the men all reverently wandered amidst the pristine white products, when I cleared my throat and issued the immortal proclaimation (a little louder than intended)
"Right then - pearl necklace time"
I ended up buying them a Toblerone.
(*Apparently they've upgraded it to Diamonds in the 'Contemporary' list, but seeing as that may as well be called the 'Cynical Ploy To Get You All Spending More Money' list, I decided that they could wait until 60 like everyone else.)
(Fri 13th Jun 2008, 10:55, More)