b3ta.com user The first inch is the hardest
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» Join us... come join the cult

Birthday Party
Picture the scene, your girlfriend invites you to a birthday dinner around one of her mates house. Woopie, a chance to get pissed and joke around. Turn up, why am i the only one who has come with a bottle of wine? Not going to last 8 people very long. Maybe we are going to the pub after the meal. Or maybe not. How about we all stand around in a circle with our hands on the birthday boy and everyone (sans moi) speaking in tongues. THEN people start having spasms like they are cumming.

To end it all I got told off for not joining in. Must have missed the LSD course during the meal.
(Sat 28th Jan 2006, 8:54, More)

» Shame

Best....(simple the)
I've made about £30 out of him dying from the works death pool.

Feel a bit guilty.....but am sure the one minute silences at all football matches will erode this. After all, all those millions who died in the war get that (unless you are a beheaded scouser then you get 3), so why not Georgie?
(Sat 26th Nov 2005, 4:59, More)

» That's when I knew it was over...

Patronising Bitch
After working for 9 months in a crappy goverment battery farm job being called into a office by my manager and whilst tapping the screen of a computer being told 'you're not suited to this type of work'.

She had a great rack though
(Sat 23rd Jul 2005, 9:34, More)