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Profile for furey:
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» The Police

the price of death
i was merrily cycling my way to my first job, in the pitch dark at 4 in the morning.
whilst darting off the pavement i cut up jam sandwich, who quickly pulled me over. out steps the obligatory fresh faced young cop and old jaded tosser cop.
"why dont you have any lights fitted to you bike?"
"because i cant afford them. i havnt had my first paycheck yet"
"well, can you afford... TO DIE?" he says over dramaticaly
helpfully, the young pig makes a fair counter point-
"dying is free, mick"
(Sat 24th Sep 2005, 17:14, More)

» Being told off as an adult

its a mans life
what was i up to? i was 5 mins late one morning last month. i was confined to my room for 10 days and forced to write a 2000 word essay on timekeeping, then read it out in front of the seniors. not much interesting about that, but the surprising thing is that i am a 25 year old corporal in the british army, and not a small child. the army really is THAT shit.
(Sat 22nd Sep 2007, 0:47, More)

» Common

Fire
the most 'council' fire in the world is a chip pan fire and the very idea of them annoys me.
(Fri 17th Oct 2008, 16:35, More)

» Bullshit and Bullshitters

Re-trading
When I joined the army the guy in the bedspace next to me introduced himself, utterly sincerely, with the line "hi my names Ashton, but everyone calls me maverick. I've just transferred to the army from the us navy top gun school of flight. I normally fly F14's but decided to try something different"

The something different was logistics truck driving incidentally. He eventually got thrown out for taking a shit in the bottom of his locker before an inspection (I still had to put up with the twat for 6 months before we got to that point mind you).
(Fri 14th Jan 2011, 15:57, More)

» Oldies vs Computers

grandad we love you
my grandad has come into posesion of a laptop, hes got the hang of it quite well considering his age, but he thinks you can find an adaptor plug for any purpouse, ie getting his printed documents displayed on his telly instead of coming out of the printer, "to make it bigger and easier to read".
(Tue 26th Sep 2006, 14:06, More)
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