» Shame

I may have to move house..
During the end of a drunken night out of attempting to pull rough lady-boys who look like Kylie in pissed vision, i got home to discover that feeling of a huge turd forcing itself out. Also feeling sick as a dog there was no time to waste as i made my way to the crapper. After sitting on the bog for a few minutes, the feeling of vomit-expulsion was stronger than ever, so i quickly lept off the toilet and put my head over the bowl. After gagging but not vomiting, i realised i needed a shat more than ever, so i sat back on the toilet. This went on for several minutes, each motion becoming stronger than the other momentarily. That is until as i lept off the toilet yet again to insert my head over it, i ended up shitting all over the floor, then as i attempted to sit back on the toilet i projectile vomited all over the wall in front of me. Not one drop of either landed in the toilet. I blamed the girfriend when my mother almost died of shock. She still believes it was her to this day.
(Fri 25th Nov 2005, 18:23, More)