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» Sacked

Long story but worth reading!
About 2 years ago, a friend and I were working in a fast food restaurant that I shall keep nameless. One of the managers there was working one night with us and giving us hell. She left at 11pm, and me and my mate Dan finished about 1am after all the cleaning was finished etc etc.

Anyway, we decided that we were so pissed off with her for the grief she'd given us that we were going to go round her house and piss on her car. Unfortunately, she lived in a village a few miles away and had no idea where her house was. After about 30 minutes of searching we gave up and went home.

The next day a group of us went tenpin bowling in Cheltenham, and on the way home, me and Dan happened to be the only 2 in my car, so decided we'd try again. This time we rang a mate who happily gave us directions to her house. Once there we placed 2 KFC bags on the roof of her car, and Dan proceeded to urinate on it, right over the drivers side door handle. I wanted to join in but had to run away before I actually started crying with laughter.

One week later and word of our deed had spread around the store (I think everybody knew about it apart from her). Another Monday night meant another trip bowling - this time 10 of us went in 2 cars and we decided a repeat performance was a good idea. This time all 10 of us went, resulting in 8 KFC bags being placed on her roof, and I threw a cup of piss all over the back of her car.

Next day and I was driving back from Stratford and I get a phone call from a mate who was pissing himself as he was telling me that she had come into work crying because "nobody likes her," and somehow she found out it was me and Dan. An investigation followed and we all got questioned, all denying that any urination had taken place but admitting the KFC incident as a "bad joke". We then bought her a box of chocolates and an apology card, thinking we'd got away with it.

Next day however, me and Dan get called into the office and needless to say we get sacked. However, 30 minutes after we left our victim arrived at work and found herself being ignored by virtually everybody. It seemed she had become even more unpopular, and once again spent the day in tears.

But, the story doesn't end there, me and Dan appealled against our sacking and won our appeal. The only reason it was successful is because we'd bought her the chocolates and the card, and she'd failed to mention that fact to the cock-sucking franchisee who'd ordered our dismissal.

So, the lesson to be learnt from this, is if you do fuck up, apologise before you get sacked, not after.

I still work at the same place during uni holidays, and have my original dismissal letter in a frame on my wall!
(Thu 23rd Feb 2006, 16:53, More)