b3ta.com user drbroon
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Recent front page messages:

(Wed 17th Dec 2014, 14:37, More)

(Sat 24th Aug 2013, 23:56, More)

(Fri 20th Jan 2012, 14:23, More)

inspired by taters lovely pic on the popular page
(Tue 26th Jul 2011, 11:24, More)

(Mon 25th Apr 2011, 0:06, More)

Finally, a reply

(Fri 4th Feb 2011, 22:14, More)


(Mon 24th Jan 2011, 20:00, More)

(Thu 18th Nov 2010, 11:40, More)

(Thu 1st Jul 2010, 15:38, More)


(Thu 20th May 2010, 17:39, More)

(Tue 4th May 2010, 14:56, More)

awsum wkd

(Fri 19th Mar 2010, 16:44, More)


(Thu 4th Feb 2010, 12:18, More)

(Fri 22nd Jan 2010, 12:01, More)

"I have the highest of regard for the eventuality at which a scheme functions optimally"

Good gracious, I am most grateful for the received responses. I hold all of your bottoms in high regard.
(Mon 12th Oct 2009, 12:29, More)

Israel's gold medal win tinged with controversy

(Fri 25th Sep 2009, 15:15, More)

There are some people who buy things using their own hard-earned pay. For everyone else, there's MemberCard.

Click for bigger (429 kb)

(Mon 17th Aug 2009, 13:29, More)

RIP Michael's Nose

Thanks for all the nice comments everyone.
(Fri 26th Jun 2009, 13:26, More)

New Cadbury's White Chocolate Ad

(Thu 11th Jun 2009, 15:42, More)


with thanks/apologies to emvee (and perhaps weebl) for the original shatnershatnershatner gif... I felt the need to lengthen it...
(Tue 9th Jun 2009, 11:57, More)


(Tue 2nd Jun 2009, 14:34, More)

went for a coffee and missed all the loveliness. thanks all :)

(Thu 9th Apr 2009, 15:31, More)

(Thu 19th Feb 2009, 12:44, More)

(Mon 20th Oct 2008, 11:41, More)

The new graphic government warnings have some potential.

(Tue 7th Oct 2008, 22:28, More)

Many thanks to Harryhausens for the great source.
(Thu 5th Jun 2008, 20:53, More)

(Fri 11th Apr 2008, 2:07, More)

(Thu 20th Mar 2008, 14:20, More)

Charlie Brown

Click his big face, and it shall be larger. (180KB)
(Fri 7th Mar 2008, 12:35, More)

Subterranean Prittstick Blues

(Thu 21st Feb 2008, 13:29, More)


(Mon 11th Feb 2008, 16:50, More)

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighwaaaaaaaaaaaaay tooooooooooooo-ooooooooooo the DANGAZOOOOOOOONE

(Thu 24th Jan 2008, 12:37, More)

I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how?

(Tue 8th Jan 2008, 17:25, More)

(Fri 12th Oct 2007, 16:22, More)

(Wed 10th Oct 2007, 13:20, More)


(Tue 9th Oct 2007, 10:35, More)

Girl with the silly big loopy earring

(Wed 30th May 2007, 13:26, More)

Doesn't even flinch.

(Tue 8th May 2007, 14:23, More)

bindun most likely.

New, improved, 1.35k less than 50k limit. :P
(Mon 4th Dec 2006, 14:50, More)

Best answers to questions:

» The worst sex I ever had

Valentine's Day
I met a girl near the end of the night, who was a rather excellent blonde goth. Delighted at my luck, I followed her to the taxi which took us to her flat. Back there, we did a lot of sex, all sorts, while listening to an odd mix of Marilyn Manson and Bush by the light of her lava lamp. I woke the next morning feeling satisfied but a little sick from the hangover. She woke about the same time and I gave her a morning kiss. She looked at me in horror at first but said it was nothing. After 5 minutes or so of very strained conversation, I decided to go for a pee and head home, assuming she didn't like what she saw. Upon looking in the bathroom mirror I realised that my whole face, from just below my eyes, my neck, chest, hands, stomach and thighs were covered in dried blood. I washed it off in the sink and went back to the girl and she didn't mention a thing and I never asked.

We continued our arrangement for about 4 weeks until I accidentally came in her eye, which seemed to have an effect on her ability to answer my calls.
(Thu 21st Jun 2007, 16:30, More)

» Terrible food

I spent my 21st birthday
in France with my family. Very nice place called Colmar which is nearish to Germany and was actually owned by the Nazeyes at one point I think.
Anyway, the night before I had rather a lot to drink and so was still feeling a bit dodgy when it came to dinner time. My nice new french auntie served up two starters. the first was a grotesque layered thing with crepe, cream cheese, pesto and smoked salmon thing. These things dont usually turn my stomach, but the texture of it was like cold ready chewed bread. I thought I was going to chuck after the first mouthful and there was a ridiculous amount of this crepe thing. My sister wisely declined but I fought on and managed to get it all down.

Then came the second appetiser. Raw mince with onions in it. As soon as i got a forkful in my mouth, I excused myself, puked in my mouth as I entered the bathroom, calmly removed my nice white shirt, and violently spewed into the toilet.

After having a brief clean up, I returned and heartily enjoyed the main course of rare-cooked duck.
(Wed 23rd May 2007, 11:20, More)

» Going Too Far

The Ballad of Davey Broon
I was at a music festival in Scotland called T in the park. After many beers and smokes on the Friday night we rose on the Saturday morning rather bleary eyed and got straight back into it.
Sitting there in my mate's big tent, a few of the boys let off one or two large farts (or "pumps", as my mum used to call them). Well I felt confident in my colon to produce a louder and more comical noise than them so squeezed out a beauty which was gratefully received by all. That is except my boxers. I shat myself terribly. However, I managed not to cry and skulked off to my tent to change and get washed with the baby wipes. I then disposed of the soiled garment in the rubbish pile of a nearby gathering of tents. I didn't tell anyone about it until I confided in a friend at the gathering the next year. Seconds later I was named Davey Broon, and 8 years later, I still am. Shite.
(Fri 10th Nov 2006, 18:01, More)