b3ta.com user Jamie_W
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» The thing I've been most ashamed of doing with a penis

The greatest urine/girlfriend/hotel story ever told
Was staying in a hotel with my now ex-girlfriend. After much sex and wine, we went to sleep.

At about 4am I awoke needing a piss, still slightly drunk, with eyes stuck together with sleep, I staggered to the toilet. It was still dark and I didn't turn the light on in there, so I just stood in front of the toilet and began to pee.

But instead of a splashy noise, all I heard was a dull, bassy sounding impact. When I finished, I curiously turned on the bathroom light to find my girlfriends clothes sat on the closed toilet seat, absolutley soaked in piss. The immediate solution was to throw them in the bath and go back to sleep.

The morning was met by my total lack of recollection of the event, until the girlfriend went into the bathroom and was dismayed that her clothes had fallen into the bath and had gotten all wet. I have never stifled laughter so hard in all my life.

She never did find out either.
(Thu 12th Mar 2009, 17:54, More)

» Best Graffiti Ever

One I began...
At Leeds Uni library, in the basement toilets (the best ones), I started a list of Premiership footballers who were gay. Over the following weeks the list was added to by other toilet visitors. Suggestions were also 'debunked' in an additional column, stating if the player was married or with a girlfriend. In the end, we had quite a comprehensive list.

I also went into that toilet one day and found a large blob of cum on the seat. This was unpleasant.

The homoeroticism of this toilet is only just dawning on me :/
(Thu 3rd May 2007, 17:30, More)

» Hotel Splendido

Some 'hotel' in London.
There were insects.
(Fri 18th Jan 2008, 23:46, More)