b3ta.com user UndeadChicken
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Recent front page messages:

Dos!

Did they run msDos on submarines?
Now you can click on it for bigger and clearer!
(Thu 1st Feb 2007, 6:01, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Best Graffiti Ever

Hilarity
Bottom of a stall door: "Beware of gay limbo dancers"

It was funny at the time.

On a corkboard in the work bathroom above the urinal: "Where's Waldo?"
To wich somebody added "Killed the Fucker"

On same corkboard is a V for Vendetta style V carved into it, and various employees calling various managers gay, three lines of "Painted Black" the list goes on, really.
(Thu 3rd May 2007, 21:34, More)

» Tales of the Unexplained

A couple of years ago
I was out of my province (I'm Canadian, incidentally) with my best friend and his family, staying in a nice little cabin. Well, everybody had a room to themselves except for me, I had a fold-out futon couch, in the living room area, which had windows all over (and I've never really liked unshuttered windows at night)

I slept well enough, occaisionally sharing my bed with their small dog, occaisionally having the thing to myself. Except one night, where I awoke, and the moon must have been full or something, for there was just enough light for me to make out a massive man-shaped shadow. At the foot of my bed.

Needless to say, I was scared shitless and spent the next four hours, terrified of sleeping, playing my friend's Gamecube on his TV.
Terrified, I played that Gamecube without moving for several hours, never once taking my eyes off that screen for fear I might see this visitor again.
My friend's mom eventually found me staring at the TV and she was able to convince me that sleep was, in fact, a good thing.
(Thu 3rd Jul 2008, 12:10, More)

» Messing with the Dark Side

Not so much the result of messing with the Dark Side...
But I was out on a trip with my friend and his parents at their cabin, way deep in the sticks.
And I was sleeping one night after an uneventful day.
I wake up an some godforsaken hour and I see this massive shadowy figure standing at the foot of my bed.
Scared the hell out of me.

Probably just some sleep-induced hallucination.
(Sat 22nd Apr 2006, 5:25, More)

» Ginger

Red body hair, my beard, and the internet.
This is the tale of these three, nothing particularly spectacular, but I have story to tell, so damnit I will.

So, being the lonely single type I was, I was posting about on a dating site, giving a general description of myself I let slip that my beard liked to grow in quite red. I get a hit quite quickly. With great anticipation I open the email sent to me, she asks "Is all your body hair red?" I tell her, that sadly(or not), it isn't. She replies with "That's too bad, red body hair really gets me going, I'd have to jump your bones."
I didn't think it was too bad, as any woman that'd sleep with an internet person due strictly to red shorthairs is probably someone I don't want anything to do with.
(Wed 3rd Mar 2010, 12:07, More)

» Famous people I hate

Rachel Ray
I hate this woman with a fiery passion that inspires the hopeless.
I don't care how much Italian heritage you have, if you don't have an Italian accent when speaking english, please do not pronounce Italian ingredients with an Italian accent. It's just stupid.

Also, Ms. Ray, stop saying "yum-o" or I will bash your head in with a teflon-coated non-stick baseball bat.
God damn Rachel Ray.
(Sun 7th Feb 2010, 6:57, More)
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