» Work Experience

Cornish Pasties in the samples oven
I'm an A level student, doing maths, chem and phys. I want to be a chemical engineer, so last summer I got a student placement at a small, friendly engineering firm in Somerset. I was working with two other students, one from France, one from Malaysia. We had to work in the labs, testing how quickly different chemicals were filtered through a sieve like material. After filtering them, we had to dry them in a big old industrial oven.

So, it's slow work day, myself and the other two students are in the lab, browsing pron and b3ta on the company laptop. I nip down to the shop for some Ginsters pasties. I like them warm, so I stuff them into the samples oven, next to the filtered and drying samples of tin mine effluent, copper sulphate - toxic stuff.

Just so happens that day, the company are doing a Health and Safety inspection...

In walks the HS officer, who wanders around, checking bottles and stuff. She then looks at us, and says 'Can you smell something? Like pastry?' before walking off. Close call. I'm sure she was suspicious when she went in again and found three pasty wrappers on the bench, and pastry crumbs in the oven!

They paid me £6.50 per hour to eat pasties and watch porn on their laptop. Even worse, I heard they went bankrupt this March.

I'm an evil, evil person
(Sun 13th May 2007, 11:46, More)

» Terrible food

chicken
I've had severe diarrhea for the last 4 days.


Last time I cook 4 day old, unrefridgerated chicken...
(Wed 23rd May 2007, 11:20, More)

» Why should you be fired from your job?

sabotage
I just sabotaged an expensive piece of engineering machinery at an unnamed production facility using a 6ft long piece of scaffold. It will take at least 5 hours to fix, during which time I was supposed to be taking a sample every 2 minutes... For 5 hours... Now, I'm eating bacon butties and surfing b3ta. I feel evul...
(Fri 10th Aug 2007, 11:46, More)