» Awesome Sickies

sick sickie
Pulling a sickie from school, I decided to add a dramatic flourish which would surely confirm my gippy tummy, by making some realistic sick in a bucket. Cue an early-morning raid on the fridge and various kitchen cupboards. Result: a rather (as I thought it) splendid-looking mess of fake vom in Mum's bucket. When she came in to see why I was still in bed, she took one look in the proferred bucket, gave me a steely stare and said 'Get up, go to school and we'll say no more about it.' The shame - but for years I couldn't understand how she had known, as it looked ultra-realistic. Eventually I asked her. The answer? The raw rice grains in the mix. Tits. Oh - another scam was holding the thermometer against the bedside light bulb. Got caught with that one when it registered such a high temperature that I should have been dead.
(Fri 9th Jun 2006, 14:04, More)