» My sex misconceptions

Erections
Back in the heady days of year 4, when nobody was really sure what a condom was but knew you wore it in bed (I thought they were like some sort of boxer shorts) I overheard 2 girls talking about their dog, and how it had had something called an "erection".
Naturally intrigued I joined in with "What did it look like?" and got as my reply:
"It was sort of long and red with two little balls at the end"

Naturally I thought this was disgusting and went to ask one of my more knowledgeable friends if this was too, and imagine my horror when he confirms to me that erections can also occur in man! "But why?" I ask perplexed.
"When you have one it means you're ready for sex" he replies.

So, I mull over this information and for the next year and a bit (until sex education came along and corrected some misconceptions...) terrified of the onset of an erection.

Why?

For reasons unknown to me now, I had come to the conclusion that an erection involved passing a long thin red ribbon of tissue attached to your balls out of your penis. Like losing your baby teeth this was a natural shedding process that caused you to be ready for sexytime.

I just couldn't stop thinking about how painful it would be to pass the balls at the end, and kept a close watch for anything coming out of the little man...

(It is only now I write this I realise how truly weird this was.)
(Sun 28th Sep 2008, 11:23, More)