» Evil Pranks

Bears
Back when I was at uni, on of my housemates got his hands on a full body bear costume.

For some reason the kitchen window above the sink in the neighbours house looked directly into our living room.

Anyway, the day this bear costume turned up, one of the neighbours was doing the washing up, and got highly excited as she saw a life size bear next door - off she ran to get all her mates.

At which point my mate promptly got out of the bear costume, and we all sat there watching the TV, and looking a little confused why there are 4 girls staring at us from next door.

5 months we kept this up. Only ever letting one of the 4 neighbours see the bear costume, and making every effort to make sure that she saw it every day. If I'm being honest, we were trying to make her (and her house mates) think she'd lost the plot.

One day we realised she was working behind the bar in one of the locals. In walks Joe, fully dressed, and asks her if they serve honey.

She was literally rolling around on the floor, unable to speak!
(Mon 17th Dec 2007, 14:21, More)

» Going Too Far

Fancy Dress
Just last week my little brother (we'll call him Ron Weasley as he's flaming ginger) had a fancy dress party to go to, and the theme was "Under the Sea".

After several hours of pondering how easy it would be to dress up like Nemo, or the little mermaid or whatever, him and a mate finally decided to go as Chinese Cockle Pickers.

When he told me I laughed so hard it hurt!
(Mon 13th Nov 2006, 13:10, More)

» Guilty Secrets

Working in a ski resort
A long time ago, before I started uni, I spent a winter working in a ski resort in France. It was a mind numbing job, and I basically spent my mornings cleaning rooms and the afternoons skiing! However, we weren't allowed out skiing until all the rooms were cleaned, and we had to do a proper job as the manager inspected them.

One week we had a bunch of proper chavs in (I'm not sure the term chav had been invented then, but they clearly were) - and every day they left their room in a proper state - it took hours to clean, and seriously cut into our skiing time.

So at the end of the week we got some revenge - we pissed in all their shampoo bottles, and then proceeded to shove their tooth brushes (brush end first) up our arses. The best bit is that one of them had left a camera in the room, so we took some photos.

I'd love to have seen their faces, when they came back from boots, to realise they'd been brushing their teeth with brushes that had been up someone bum!

And I don't really feel guilty at all - they deserved it!
(Mon 3rd Sep 2007, 13:29, More)

» Stupid Dares

Eating a Jizz Sandwich
A while ago I spent a season working in a ski resort. 2 of my mates out there had a season long bet on a pool competition - whoever had won the most games by a given date won. The looser had the choice of penalties - either ski from the top of the mountain to the bottom completely naked, or eat a jizz sandwich, prepared by the winner.

Fearing instant deportation for being naked in public, Alex went for the jizz option.

The sandwich was presented on a bed of freshly plucked pubes, and I've never seen anyone gag so much trying to eat a sandwich!

The beauty of this is that there's plenty of video evidence to back it all up!
(Thu 1st Nov 2007, 17:36, More)

» Evil Pranks

Hotel cleaning
I think I've posted this before, but it's certainly relevant here....

Many moons ago, I spent a season working in a ski resort in France. My job basically involved cleaning guest rooms and serving dinner.

The way things worked, once all the rooms were cleaned on your floor you could go out skiing. One week, we had a right bunch of louts in - their room was an absolute mess every day. Given that the manager inspected the rooms, we had to clean it properly.

Anyway, by the end of the week me and my mate are getting really pissed off that this is wasting us 1/2 on the hill every day, and decide to get some revenge.

I pissed in a bottle of sun-in (mmm rubbing my urine into your hair is nice), and my mate proceeded to insert each of their toothbrushes into his bum (one at a time), brush end first.

What really tops this off is that they'd left a camera in the room. I'd love to have seen their faces when those photos came back from boots, and they realised just what they've been brushing their teeth with for the last few days!

I don't feel guilty - the fuckers deserved it
(Mon 17th Dec 2007, 14:10, More)