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» The Worst Journey in the World
All hail the X5 Bus
The X5 bus from Cambridge to Bedford is usually a relatively luxurious coach. Unless you, say, choose to use it to get home on the night of Strawberry Fair (a large free festival in Cambridge) at which point it spookily metamorphoses into a creaky old double-decker. Buses home after Strawberry Fair are also completely packed, and everyone on board has been freely partaking of their drug of choice all day. Up on the top deck behind us it's party time, with bongos, spliffs a-plenty and lager for all. Now, the last bus takes hours, stops absolutely everywhere, and this night it has no toilet on board.
Ladies and gentlemen, do you know what happens when a troupe of desperate merrymakers all piss in the corner at the back of a bus? Absolutely nothing, that's what. Until the bus starts going downhill.
(Wed 13th Sep 2006, 17:14, More)
All hail the X5 Bus
The X5 bus from Cambridge to Bedford is usually a relatively luxurious coach. Unless you, say, choose to use it to get home on the night of Strawberry Fair (a large free festival in Cambridge) at which point it spookily metamorphoses into a creaky old double-decker. Buses home after Strawberry Fair are also completely packed, and everyone on board has been freely partaking of their drug of choice all day. Up on the top deck behind us it's party time, with bongos, spliffs a-plenty and lager for all. Now, the last bus takes hours, stops absolutely everywhere, and this night it has no toilet on board.
Ladies and gentlemen, do you know what happens when a troupe of desperate merrymakers all piss in the corner at the back of a bus? Absolutely nothing, that's what. Until the bus starts going downhill.
(Wed 13th Sep 2006, 17:14, More)
» * PFFT *
Crying wolf
One day a few years ago - and after a night of hearty garlic consumption - I came into work early. The building was deserted so I took the opportunity let a few loose to relieve the mounting pressure. Shortly thereafter, in came the departmental administrator. For some reason he was suddenly seized with the notion that the drains had backed up.
A gentleman was called in to inspect the drains. There was nothing wrong with them.
A few months later, the drain in question actually blocked and started to stink. However, the authorities having ascertained that the smell was nothing to do with the drains, nothing was done about it...
(Fri 13th Jul 2007, 21:40, More)
Crying wolf
One day a few years ago - and after a night of hearty garlic consumption - I came into work early. The building was deserted so I took the opportunity let a few loose to relieve the mounting pressure. Shortly thereafter, in came the departmental administrator. For some reason he was suddenly seized with the notion that the drains had backed up.
A gentleman was called in to inspect the drains. There was nothing wrong with them.
A few months later, the drain in question actually blocked and started to stink. However, the authorities having ascertained that the smell was nothing to do with the drains, nothing was done about it...
(Fri 13th Jul 2007, 21:40, More)