» My Greatest Regrets

Deep Heat + genitals != good
Two lots of speed training (running, that is, rather than anything illicit) left me with a seriously strained/pulled/painful-as-fuck muscle at the very top of my left leg. I regret buying a tube of Deep Heat during my lunch hour and liberally smothering said painful area with the stuff. I also regret wearing a pair of loose-fitting undercrackers that day as it meant that my knackers brushed up against the not-quite-fully-rubbed-in cream. I spent about half an hour sat at work with the distinct feeling that someone had smothered my family jewels in petrol and set light to them. Still, it took the muscle pain away for about an hour and also gave me a new appreciation for anyone currently staying at Guantanamo Bay.
(Fri 6th Oct 2006, 20:59, More)