b3ta.com user mazzmatazz
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Profile for mazzmatazz:
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I like to make things. At the moment, I like making vector images but I do lots of other things too. I spin contact Fire Staff, I'm learning to poledance, I help out at a local alternative music night, I go to most of my boyfriend's gigs and attempt to look cool, I build computers out of spare parts my dad foists off onto me, and I get a lot of mysterious bruises.

I love my psausage76

Recent front page messages:

what smoker's toothpaste should really mean*


*I don't smoke personally. Asthma and all that prevents it.

Thank you my psausage76 for letting me steal your idea.
(Sun 11th Feb 2007, 23:38, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Best Graffiti Ever

I do love a silly bit of graffiti.
Recently I saw "show us yer front bum" inside a ladies loo.

And at the rehearsal studio the other half goes to, someone had daubed the word "CUNT" on a door. Another helpful chap had added the word "OX" afterwards.

Don't know what a Cunt Ox is, but it amuses me.

And near his old school, he tells me there was some stating "PAKIS GO BACK TO AFRICA"

Edit: And watching some police documentary on Sky 3, somewhere in Ireland there is graffiti saying "GAY DADS ON ACID"
(Thu 3rd May 2007, 22:34, More)

» Personal Hygiene

The main reason my ex husband is my ex husband
is his total and utter lack of hygiene.

At first he was ok, he'd wash every day. Then he stopped brushing his teeth completely, because 'it made them bleed'. This was because where he barely ever brushed his teeth, he had terrible gum disease. His breath always smelt and I had to make him chew gum almost constantly to stop it.

He then stopped showering most days. That didn't help our sex life, which rapidly dropped off on the occasion I discovered knob cheese. I ordered him to the bathroom and refused to do anything more until he had scrubbed himself thoroughly.

It was the skidmarks in the pants that really sealed the deal. Either that or that he never, ever washed up. Even though I did everything else re cooking and cleaning, while he sat on his stinky arse.

I'm glad I walked out on the cunt a long time ago.
(Thu 22nd Mar 2007, 18:56, More)

» Personal Hygiene

I've just remembered...
One of the girls at work can be quite grim sometimes. Don't ever, ever lend her plates or cutlery. She will leave it on the windowsill next to her desk for at least a week with dirty food on, before you have to rescue it and wash it yourself.

However, the worst thing is a story she frequently tells us (she loves talking. especially about herself). On this occasion, she says she was ill, and somehow shat the bed. She tried to wake her boyfriend and he ignored her and carried on sleeping. So rather than persevereing and changing the sheets, she went and got a towel, laid it over the shit, then went back to sleep.
(Mon 26th Mar 2007, 19:39, More)

» The Weird Kid In Class

Being that I went to a Convent school...
...it's surprising that the girls in my classes weren't weirder than they could have been.

AG was pretty weird. An early bloomer, the only girl age 11 with breasts, and a general weirdo, she was pretty much shunned. She developed an unhealthy obsession with Take That, cutting her hair short so it was like Robbie's, and running away from home when he left the band. I don't think she came back to school after that.

CG wasn't in my class, but she was also quite weird. She would walk around the school field every lunchtime talking to trees (or herself). Amusingly, she now works where I do, and everyone refers to her as 'that weirdo on the fourth floor'. She still talks to herself, and runs down corridors like a mong.

Even weirder was RF. She decided early on that she was quite the militant butch dyke, then proceeded to sexually assault her best friend at the time. Needless to say, said friend wasn't her friend any longer. She then stalked this girl, sending her Valentine's cards, until she discovered the mother of her new best friend. New best friend, (a different AG), ironically, is CG's sister! (Amazingly, this AG is a very well adjusted and lovely girl!) I happened to be at her house one day when her mother and RF turn up, and proceed to suck each other's faces off on the sofa. I had to leave. It wasn't right.
(Sun 21st Jan 2007, 11:48, More)

» Council Cunts

On one of my house moves, about 4 years ago,
My council took 9 months to locate me and send me a Council Tax bill, despite me telling them I'd moved. So I told them to stick it, they would have to wait 9 months for me to pay them. And they did.

And I started working there towards the start of those 9 months, and they still couldn't find me.

And they've sold my job twice since then so I now technically work for an American company that I've never heard of.

(Sun 29th Jul 2007, 23:10, More)
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