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» School Trips

History, Geography, French…
They always got the glory of having school trips, but in my final year, our D.T teachers decided to redress the balance and take the two woodwork classes to a local engineering firm.

The two classes weren’t split in terms of intelligence or aptitude, simply on a violence threshold. I was in the (slightly) less violent class and we made the trip in the morning, with the loonies in the second class to follow in the afternoon. We traipsed over fields, and on the way worked ourselves into the usual merry frenzy a trip brings.

Thus begun one of the most boring/ hilarious hours of my life. The trip itself was tedious beyond belief (having C.A.D machines demonstrated in FULL detail). One of the head guys showing us round insisted on explaining these new fangled “computers” to us (it was 1998) as though we were from the middle ages, and kept referring to disks as “diskettes” thus prompting the parroting from one of our number “biscuits, biscuits?? Where’s the biscuits??”

This idiocy continued; a few morons causing the rest of us to cry out in laughter every 30 seconds by humping the lathes and pressing lots of buttons (causing the loss of at least one weeks work and several hundreds of pounds worth of materials if memory serves) until we were eventually chucked out early and severely bollocked by the teacher (who looked like Zangief) and the engineers for taking the piss.

The highlight of the visit from the second class was when one lad (Nicky) decided that one of the expensive moulds he was shown would make a nice ring so pocketed it. It was worth a few grand and the police were later summoned.

A letter was subsequently sent to the school from the engineers stating that we were NEVER to visit them again, and that they would refuse apprenticeships to anyone applying from our school in the future.

This is my first post, so I apologise for my gargantuan length but bear in mind, when visiting the U.S, I have to maintain a concealed weapon license in all 50 states in order to legally wear pants.
(Tue 12th Dec 2006, 11:14, More)