Profile for Menlui:
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- a member for 17 years, 3 months and 13 days
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- has posted 12 stories and 1 replies on question of the week
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» Abusing freebies
It was free......
Sort of, but i plugged my ex as much as i could
(Sat 10th Nov 2007, 19:57, More)
It was free......
Sort of, but i plugged my ex as much as i could
(Sat 10th Nov 2007, 19:57, More)
» Guilty Secrets
Pah secrets
I have no guilty secrets cause when i get liqoured up i develop an extrodinary range of skills the worst being the 'Celebrity disease' in that i have no shame so tell everyone (including random members of the public) my filthy escapades
and yes i have shagged a mates (well a mate of mate) mum there was no guilt, that was until i saw her in sunlight (it still gives me shivers)
but in my opinion my best is a fortnight ago i got my mates mum and little brother stoned off their respective trolley's and my mate would kick seven shades of shit out of me if he found out
its only a matter of time too as i get liquored all the time and have told almost all and sundry
(Tue 4th Sep 2007, 13:13, More)
Pah secrets
I have no guilty secrets cause when i get liqoured up i develop an extrodinary range of skills the worst being the 'Celebrity disease' in that i have no shame so tell everyone (including random members of the public) my filthy escapades
and yes i have shagged a mates (well a mate of mate) mum there was no guilt, that was until i saw her in sunlight (it still gives me shivers)
but in my opinion my best is a fortnight ago i got my mates mum and little brother stoned off their respective trolley's and my mate would kick seven shades of shit out of me if he found out
its only a matter of time too as i get liquored all the time and have told almost all and sundry
(Tue 4th Sep 2007, 13:13, More)
» Terrible Parenting
Fire!!!
I was sat home one night supping a can of beer and playing Fable on Xbox, when my mother, pissed and stoned, wanders into the house and states 'It's very dark I'll light some candles' so off she pops to the kitchen, and brings forth every bloody candle she had and laid them on a 2ft square coffee table and proceeded to light them all. Then in her inebriated state she plods off back into the night (only god knows where she went) leaving the front door wide open. Me being a bit of gamer was pretty much unaware of what was happening, that is until I catch a faint whiff of something burning.....
I look to my right and yes the whole bloody table and half the wall are on fire.
'ARRRRGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!' Screams I before jumping into action and grabbing every available towel, soaking them in water and battering the flames, successfully putting the fire out.
A few hours later mother stumbles back in, where i start to shout obscenities, with sentences in between, at her and the woman had the cheek to start screaming back about how i ruined her TOWELS!!!!!!!!
(Sat 18th Aug 2007, 7:20, More)
Fire!!!
I was sat home one night supping a can of beer and playing Fable on Xbox, when my mother, pissed and stoned, wanders into the house and states 'It's very dark I'll light some candles' so off she pops to the kitchen, and brings forth every bloody candle she had and laid them on a 2ft square coffee table and proceeded to light them all. Then in her inebriated state she plods off back into the night (only god knows where she went) leaving the front door wide open. Me being a bit of gamer was pretty much unaware of what was happening, that is until I catch a faint whiff of something burning.....
I look to my right and yes the whole bloody table and half the wall are on fire.
'ARRRRGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!' Screams I before jumping into action and grabbing every available towel, soaking them in water and battering the flames, successfully putting the fire out.
A few hours later mother stumbles back in, where i start to shout obscenities, with sentences in between, at her and the woman had the cheek to start screaming back about how i ruined her TOWELS!!!!!!!!
(Sat 18th Aug 2007, 7:20, More)
» Why should you be fired from your job?
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeecause
I don't do shit. I'm a lazy fucker
(Sat 11th Aug 2007, 22:49, More)
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeecause
I don't do shit. I'm a lazy fucker
(Sat 11th Aug 2007, 22:49, More)