» Public Transport Trauma

On the subject of jumpers.....
I used to commute to Brighton from London on a daily basis on the lovely green 'Southern' trains. On a return trip during the summer of 2004(?) i was sat, minding my own business, hurtling along at some oscene speed when the train just stops. No announcement, just stops. The train was sat about half way between Gatwick and Brighton. All around was green fields and no roads. We must have sat for almost 2 hours goinng nowhere, until a Southern van drives up next to the train and starts fiddling about. After another 45 minutes we get to bumpkinville rail station and everyone is told that due to a fault with the train we have to get off. So dutifully we all tramp to the end of the train (the platform was so little we had to get out on the front 4 coaches) only to find that as we walked down the train there was what looked like mud splashed across all the windows. It only became apparent when we left the train that a suicidal idiot had jumped in front of the train, and due to speed/mass qualities of physics, had literally caved in the whole driver cabin. It honestly looked like a car had driven into the train. Anyway, so on the traumatic part...

... The only other train heading home was also taking a billion Britney Spears (or something) fans to a one-off event in London, so after cramming onto a packed train, all of use business types had to sit and listen to a chorus of children singing Britney's worst the whole way to London, stopping at every hick station on the way. I hate people. Especially teeny-boppers.
(Thu 29th May 2008, 16:33, More)

» Public Transport Trauma

In regards to Kaol's bass....
I took a bass on the tube the other day, but unfortunately I didn't have a gig bag so it was just poking out of my holdall (straight up in the air). Now the headstock on said bass looks like this: farm4.static.flickr.com/3292/2328125327_d9e5311a7f.jpg

Now for everyone who gets the tube - think of those twats who dive throught the doors at the last minute and delay the train by making the door re-open...

So i'm stood on a busy train (i.e. only enough space for my two feet) with the point end of the bass angled towards the doors and mr 'I like to jump on at the last minute' dived in and missed having his eye socket cruelly penetrated by about 3mm. I laughed. He looked a little scared. I hope he learnt a lesson. If not, I urge us all to take pointy but un-prohibited items into the tube for this very reason.
(Thu 29th May 2008, 15:59, More)