b3ta.com user Lomticks
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I draw meat.

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» Accidental animal cruelty

I buggered a Swan once
he claimed later that he hadn't enjoyed it..
(Thu 13th Dec 2007, 2:51, More)

» Conned

Gypsies in the centre of Rome

When I was on a trip to Rome with my colledge; I was conned like the proverbial patsy I am.

Whilst in argubly the busiest area of Rome the
'Spanish Steps' I had noticed some commotion around a group of fellow art students. Not to be taken back by jumping straight into a volley of argument I dived right into this mass of Art Students and earthy Romany tipes and in enquired as to what was up.

The next moment I was being asked to hold out my little finger by a rather crusty maustach'ed gentleman in a le-coq-sportif shell suit; things did not bode well.

He began his craft by wrapping a piece of highly coloured thread around my little finger with such deftness and speed that I was temporarily mezmerised and entered some kind of trance of admiration. Before I knew what had happened and with an intense speed the thread had transmutated into a wrist band, a coloured wrist band..on my wrist.Erm.

20 euros, he ordered, not without a forceful imperative.
Now being English; with no sense of rube or haggle about me, I accepted this shoddy and increasingly unwanted 'gift' for his asking price. Now this is where I really got buggered; all I had was a 50 euro note, and low and behold he snapped it up,(after hi-fiving me mind) shortchanged me and vanished into the crowd. Fuck!

Soon after this incident I became increasingly paranoid as to the real meaning of this colourful gypsies braclet now adorning my wrist..Thoughts of it acting as some kind of calling card to inform the other Roman gangsters and hoodlums that I was a patsy and easily japeaple raced through my mind; and subsequently (not without embarresment) I hid it from view from any passerby I suspected..
(Thu 18th Oct 2007, 16:43, More)

» Terrible food

Whilst in Amsterdam..
I was forced to dine (as camping keeps a tight budget) on Lidl's 7p a packet pot noodles (duck flavour) mixed with Lidl's own baked beans marinated in some kind of saucy noodley water.
It looked, for all the Universe, like vomit, and the initial taste was of cold watered down baked beans, however this usual gave way to nausea upon sight of said product. *sigh*

oh for the life of Riley
(Sat 19th May 2007, 19:56, More)