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- a member for 17 years, 7 months and 5 days
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- has posted 3 stories and 3 replies on question of the week
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» I witnessed a crime
Assualt
I'd love to tell you my story about the guy I witnessed doing some serious damage to someone got put away for 15 months. However, I discovered later that it was solely on the strength of my witness statement as I was the only sober witness. It then transpires that he found my name on the court documents,added 2 & 2 together after looking me up in the phone book and that my house is opposite where it took place and rang me up for a chat about it. Thanks Avon & Somerset Witness Protection. Great fucking job - can I have my fucking tax money back as a refund?
I would tell more of the gory details but his sentence is almost up and I'm not moving out for another month and really don't want to tempt fate that the ginger psychopath might be bright enough to use Google.
(Thu 14th Feb 2008, 14:36, More)
Assualt
I'd love to tell you my story about the guy I witnessed doing some serious damage to someone got put away for 15 months. However, I discovered later that it was solely on the strength of my witness statement as I was the only sober witness. It then transpires that he found my name on the court documents,added 2 & 2 together after looking me up in the phone book and that my house is opposite where it took place and rang me up for a chat about it. Thanks Avon & Somerset Witness Protection. Great fucking job - can I have my fucking tax money back as a refund?
I would tell more of the gory details but his sentence is almost up and I'm not moving out for another month and really don't want to tempt fate that the ginger psychopath might be bright enough to use Google.
(Thu 14th Feb 2008, 14:36, More)
» Expensive Mistakes
Unhinged...
I'd just finished working at a gig in Manchester and was doing a load out at the end of night - I'd been working loading in flight cases to our truck when unbeknown to me some numpty pulls up in a smart new truck, double parks along side us, opens the cab door to get out and make a pick up and decides it's too much effort to close it. This just happened to be behind my back and overhanging the tail lift.
The first I know of this is on hearing a crunching noise as the tail lift goes up and the door genntly topples onto me after being literally torn off its hinges. Whoops. I think he must have been quite chilly driving around the rest of the evening...
(Sat 27th Oct 2007, 14:12, More)
Unhinged...
I'd just finished working at a gig in Manchester and was doing a load out at the end of night - I'd been working loading in flight cases to our truck when unbeknown to me some numpty pulls up in a smart new truck, double parks along side us, opens the cab door to get out and make a pick up and decides it's too much effort to close it. This just happened to be behind my back and overhanging the tail lift.
The first I know of this is on hearing a crunching noise as the tail lift goes up and the door genntly topples onto me after being literally torn off its hinges. Whoops. I think he must have been quite chilly driving around the rest of the evening...
(Sat 27th Oct 2007, 14:12, More)
» Abusing freebies
Doritos
Back many years ago when Doritos came to the UK from across the pond they decided to try and grab the student market given that crisps seem to be one of the major food groups for skinted students. Anyway some genius thought the best way to promote them at UMST (R.I.P) was to leave big promotional tubs full of free tortilla goodness around the campus.
So being enterprising and peckish and seeing the free vend what could we do except find some bin bags and follow the chap putting them out and snaffle the lot as fast as he could put them out hoping he wouldn't notice. We had a haul of six black sacks *full* of them and no-one else got a look in. I only feel guilty as we got sick of eating them after the first sack but wouldn't give them away on principle....
(Sat 10th Nov 2007, 20:38, More)
Doritos
Back many years ago when Doritos came to the UK from across the pond they decided to try and grab the student market given that crisps seem to be one of the major food groups for skinted students. Anyway some genius thought the best way to promote them at UMST (R.I.P) was to leave big promotional tubs full of free tortilla goodness around the campus.
So being enterprising and peckish and seeing the free vend what could we do except find some bin bags and follow the chap putting them out and snaffle the lot as fast as he could put them out hoping he wouldn't notice. We had a haul of six black sacks *full* of them and no-one else got a look in. I only feel guilty as we got sick of eating them after the first sack but wouldn't give them away on principle....
(Sat 10th Nov 2007, 20:38, More)