» The worst sex I ever had

Pokemon
When I was at uni, I was seeing a really nice lad, and because it was my first proper relationship there was all the usual exploratory sex and giggling and it was good.
We (for shame) were really into Pokemon at the time, regularly having big Poke-parties in halls and being silly and generally having fun - and it was good.
Then, one night, said boyfriend took me gently in his arms in his uni-standard single bed and made love to me in his usual lovely, tender style. I actually thought at one point, I love this boy: I may marry him. That was definitely good.
Until moments later, as he shuddered into climax; my legs gripped round his ears, he screamed: "Pikaaaa.... CHOOOOOOOOOOO!"
And that was not good.
(Sun 17th Jun 2007, 14:05, More)

» What's the most horrific thing you've seen?

I do not like this.
I worked in the Crown Court, so take your pick, really.
Apart from the photos of bloated, undiscovered bodies and axe murders, there was one picture of a baby which had been held against a radiator for a long, long time. Add to this the photograph of the 14 year-old girl who had been murdered by her older "boyfriend" and several child pornography images which I'm not even going to go in to, and you can probably imgaine why I decided to fuck it all off last year and head for the speed camera department. I might now be public enemy number one (at least with the Top Gear team), but at least I don't have to see some of the most grotesque, hideous things that humanity is capable of.
The irony? I still get paid the same pittance for looking at peoples' driving licences instead of their dead babies.
(Sat 23rd Jun 2007, 12:29, More)