b3ta.com user Celtican
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» Bastard Colleagues

One guy I wont name
Underworked, overpaid, brown-nosing type. He had a water feature on his desk (says it all).
Yeah, I pissed in it.
(Thu 24th Jan 2008, 13:09, More)

» Evil Pranks

Poltergeist
I had to nip into the office during the early hours to find the nightwatchman sound asleep and snoring like a walrus. I proceeded to log into my pc and do what I needed to do and got ready to leave. Realising this was an opportunity tooooo good to miss I carefully stacked the conference room chairs in a pyramid (ala the movie Poltergeist) right next to him and then left. He was very on edge for the next few nights, whether it was due to 'paranormal activity' or the fact someone had caught him sleeping I will never know.
(Wed 19th Dec 2007, 8:34, More)

» Racist grandparents

Mechanical Racism
During the 1960's my Dad was a mechanic in Bolton. One day he was under a car on the trolley when he saw two pair of feet standing next to him. 'How's it looking?' asked the boss.
My father replied 'I can't see it's as black as a Ni**ers arsehole under here' and slid out from under the car only to be faced by his boss and the black customer to which the car belonged.
(Thu 27th Oct 2011, 16:42, More)

» Fancy Dress

Grim Reaping
I was about 16 and full of teenage anguish (oh the pain!) and decided to go toa friend' birthday party as 'Grim Reaper'. Kittted out in black cloak, skull mask and sythe I looked a right prick but felt pretty cool at the time. At the end of the evening I had enough taxi fare for about half my journey home so walked the remainder of the way. Walking through Penrhyn Bay (God's waiting room) home to most retired peoples, I got some funny looks when people walked past or out of their windows. I just waved back in a a nonchalant way. I can only truly appreciate it 15 years later...
(Thu 12th Jan 2006, 23:44, More)

» Racist grandparents

Racial Friday
A good friend of mine set up what he called 'Racial Friday' in his office, allowing pc conventions to go out of the window. Racial jibes were encouraged amongst the multiracial staff who accepted it as a way to breakdown racial stereotyping. This went on for months with the complete support of his team who he tells me loved the concept, eventually senior management shut it down as it wasn't 'pc'.
(Thu 27th Oct 2011, 16:47, More)
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