» Your first cigarette

Peer Pressure
When I was around 12 years old my parents went away on holiday. They would always bring cartons of fags home with them for my uncle. Sneakily i took one of the cartons and hid it in my room.

Later in the day i decided to go down the park where i met one of my new friends (new being about 2 weeks). Cooly i produced a packet of cigarettes and offered her one. Sat on the swings we tried to clumsily light our first drags. It took a good 5mins but after the first puff my new friend promptly puked up all over the floor.

Me, i loved it and had the whole thing. Her sitting next to me trying to look as cool as me. I decided to take her home as she looked incredibly peaky and very green.

At her front door we rang the bell and waited. The door opened and there was a HUGE brute of a pikey father, with tattoos everywhere. My mate promptly started:

"Dad, this is...."

And promptly spewed again all over her father.

There was nothing else for it, I.. just.. ran.

Incidentally after a phone call to my parents, i was banned from seeing this girl again. Funny that!

I'm still puffing away to this day.

On another subject:

One afternoon later in my life i decided to try some of that "legal" weed that i'd bought off the internet. My mate and I had a whole spliff each and felt nothing. Bored for something else to do we decided to get the bus down to the cinema. Getting on bus: no problem, getting off bus: slightly woozy....

We then went to see The Emperors New Groove with incredible sized pots of popcorn. I've never giggled so hard in my life!
(Thu 20th Mar 2008, 16:35, More)