» Pathological Liars

John the slaver.
John the slaver lives in my area and simply cannot tell the truth. I doubt if he ever has.

When I first met him he told me he was the manager of a swanky clothes shop in town and that if I went in he'd get me discount. I went in and nobody in the shop had heard of him - it turned out he worked in Sainsbury’s.

He had to cut a holiday short as his son was involved in an accident (that part was true). He said his son lost 2 toes in the accident but they grew back.

I think his best was when he had his Mum come in to the local boozer and tell everyone that sadly he wouldn't be around for a while as he had leukemia. As much as he was a knob, folk in the pub obviously felt for him and had a wee collection. With the money raised, they bought a big bunch of flowers and a box of chocolates which one of the barmaids took to his house. When she got there his Mum told her she better come in and that he didn't in fact, have leukemia - he'd lost his driving license! (wtf?)

The last time I bumped in to him he owned 5 pubs and was thinking of buying a restaurant in town.
(Mon 3rd Dec 2007, 14:11, More)