» Guilty Pleasures, part 2

evil
I have to confess to cleaning the toilet with my mother in laws toothbrush ..... evil but very funny at the time .
Guilty ..nope not a bit
Pleasure .. well worth it
(Sat 15th Mar 2008, 2:01, More)

» * PFFT *

FIRST POST
I was laying in bed a while back after just waking up, misses kthxbai just opened her eyes and stretched . Well i decided to say good morning the best way i know how, I lifted my leg and stepped on a barking spider . OMG i was well proud and she was speachless just giving me evils . This fart didnt even touch the side it just shot out at 100 mph and by god it was loud, the funniest part of it all tho was a voice from outside shouted "FUCKING HELLLLL DUDE" opps must have forgoten he window was slightly open . Much girly giggleing followed from both of us i mean how could she remain mad

If you can beat that i wanna hear about it!!!!

Oh and if anyone says ladies dont fart i have another story to prove they flippin well do .
We were doing the baby making tango the other night her legs were somewhere near her shoulders and i was well you know, getting busy with my love truncheon, she shot out an uncontrollable loud fart, the look on her face was priceless very embarassed she said omg im so sorry but it was to late i was already in stitches laughing like a big girl . After about 15 mins of me laughing and telling her i didnt mind she told me it was so bad it made my love marbles flap back and forth . That was enough to set us both off .
Farts are funny and god made them that way coz if they wernt meant to be funny he would have made them sillent and non smelly
(Wed 18th Jul 2007, 15:28, More)

» I witnessed a crime

i witnessed a crime .......... well sort of !
Summer hols last year my son came over from spain to spend the 6 weeks with me, my partner Ben and number 2 son . Well we decided to take him out to kfc for a bite of fried rat mmmm , im sat on the bed waiting for the bathroom while my son is tarting himself up. Now Ben is a twunt most of the time and this day had the devil in him decided to sneek attack the kid and spray him with my perfume kid screams like a girl and runs away Ben chases and manages a few more squirts till they both end up in my room with a final squirt and a couple of further screams the whole incident is over and forgotten ....... Till 10 mins later brats and Ben are sat in the car and im locking the door up swerves a white clapped out car with a copper in the back seat , he falls out of the car tucks in his shirt and legs over to me .
Are you alright madam, me puzzled well yes i think so , so where is the girl who has been attacked me errrm i dunno, well neighbours reported an attack ........ooooooooo erm well i know what you are on about now lol the attack was my son and Ben messing about with perfume lol. Copper well hang on a min he turns and call the station cancel the armed responce unit its all a misunderstnding. Turns out the copper had to comandeer the car a few streets away the driver and wifey must have been thinking alsorts hehehe anyway after the copper took statments and questioned brat and Ben we finaly got the fried rat .
(Fri 15th Feb 2008, 19:31, More)

» * PFFT *

i want one
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ft_OHQXWJtM&search=toot

I need one of these man i could have some fun in tescos lol
(Wed 18th Jul 2007, 15:30, More)