» Insults

Midgets
I quite like calling them People McNuggets
(Tue 9th Oct 2007, 15:56, More)

» Shit Stories: Part Number Two

Shameless Pearoast
In my last teenage year me and 2 friends broke in to a moderatly posh school during the summer.

The college was housing some Spanish students that flood Dublin every year. So we broke in through the gym's changing rooms at night and shuffled our way through the corridors, entered a few rooms and flicked on the lights to see startled young spanish students gibbering away. We found another room but the students were not in.

Cue pissing on all of the beds, all mobile phones stolen, very expensive camera's taken and some very subtle arse wiping on the sheets. So after that we went to the games room, stole the white and green ball from the snooker table and made 2 quite good gearknobs but the icing on the cake was when we were on our way out of the gym i took a dump right in the middle of painted circle of the gym floor and took a few snaps of my brown mound.

Length? About 8 inches crouching down.
(Thu 27th Mar 2008, 19:25, More)

» Stupid Dares

Xanax
At a friend's party the day after the night before, i had a banging headache, was still drinking at the time, must have been 9am.
So anyway, i asked for some headache tabs. There wasn't any about except these Xanax tabs.

Not knowing what they were for i knew they were the pills that Hollywood stars were getting off on.

So i was given 3 (dunno if that was the recommended dose) and took 2.

I had one left.

So i got the credit card out and crushed it as much as i could, got the note and snorted it with as much vigour as i would with columbia's finest.

Cue 3 mins later i'm passed out cold, i wake up about 12 hours later in a empty house in an unfamiliar room next to my mate, without a hangover might i add and both of us casually left the house feeling quite refreshed.

What i was told by my mate as we were leaving was that when i passed out is that i banged my head quite hard on the kitchen table and stopped breathing, i was slapped a few times to wake up with no avail. i was brought into the living room where thankfully i started to breathe again, my pulse had slowed down. My mate offered to stay as everyone had work/families to go to. Before they left they carried me to one of the bedrooms and my mate was vigilantly watching if there was any change.

If your wondering why a ambulance wasn't called, we were in an area where ambulances aren't the most welcome.
Anyway the fucker fell asleep watching me and i woke up feeling ok considering what happened before.

I dared myself to do this and it was the most stupid thing i've ever done. Do not snort Xanax unless you want to sleep for 12 hours and scare your friends.
(Thu 1st Nov 2007, 16:07, More)

» Insults

Nice one i used the other day
Prolly bindun

'Is your birth cert an apology letter from the condom factory?'
(Mon 8th Oct 2007, 4:59, More)

» Guilty Secrets

I just agreed
to go on salsa dancing lessons with my new gf and i'm delighted, i even checked out salsa music cd's in virgin today.
(Thu 6th Sep 2007, 0:06, More)