b3ta.com user Bootsthealchemist
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I wouldn't be on here but I can't find the TV remote

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» Letters they'll never read

Dear Mr Schrödinger
We are pleased/sorry to inform you that Mr Tibbles is fine/no longer with us.

Please call if/when you observe this message

Parrot Docs Veterinary Centre
(Fri 5th Mar 2010, 12:40, More)

» Morning After Souvenirs

Public Transport ftw
A 'quick one after work' turned into a session. Next thing I knew I was well over the limit. For once I decided to do the sensible thing and take a bus home.

How I managed to park it is anyone's guess.
(Thu 26th Apr 2012, 22:12, More)

» Celebrities part II

The Cotton Club ... in a past life
I was lucky enough to spend time with the some of the stars of the Cotton Club: Cab Calloway, Harold and Fayard Nicholas, Max Roach, Adelaide Hall & Co.

They were without exception the most urbane, cultured, well-mannered, warm-hearted, generous and genuinely lovely people I ever had the privilege to be around. Although I was a third of their age, and not worthy to organise their shoe cupboards, they were happy to answer callow questions, share war stories, sing, demonstrate dance steps and generally hang out.

These were international super stars, yet they treated me, each other, and everyone they met, with an extraordinary respect and politeness that belonged to another time.

Seriously - these stars were not even allowed to sit in the audience of the club they starred in, because of their colour. They saw other (white) song and dance stars become millionaires, while they provided the 'backing'. At all stages of their careers they were exploited, ripped off, presumed upon - in so many ways. But looking back, they simply saw themselves as infinitely lucky to have made careers from their talents.

OK no relevance to this thread - unless I can say I wish I could have been more appreciative to them at the time.
(Mon 12th Oct 2009, 23:27, More)

» It's Not What It Looks Like!

I was tackling a tricky dungeon just now, when the mother-in-law called.
I was completely derailed, and I could tell she thought she'd interrupted some intimate bedroom moment or similar (especially because of the grunts and anguished cries in the background).

Thing is, as I know she'd was probably watching that Panorama documentary on games addiction this evening, I was too embarrassed to admit what I was actually doing.
(Fri 10th Dec 2010, 1:08, More)

» Churches, temples and holy places

Santitttiago da Compostela
For YEARS I wanted to go to Santiago da Compostela and see the swinging of the giant incense burner (a tradition that started because apparently pilgrims are very whiffy). There's a bit at the end where a gang of specially-trained ninja monks wrestles the whale-sized censer to a halt, which is waay coool - I'd seen it on telly.

So I was delighted that when we got there the ceremony was just starting, AND we got a front row view. Perfect line of sight, movie camera at the ready.

A friendly wizened pilgrim next to me started explaining the proceedings, obviously keen that I shouldn't miss the way cool bit at the end. So while avidly watching the show he was also reaching out with a 'waitforit ... waitforit' sort of gesture at me - where I was precariously standing between a crowd of pilgrims and a huge brass swinging thing.

Which is how I ended up filming the famous incense ceremony at Santiago da Compostela with a set of octogenarian fingers resting gently on my left nipple.
(Fri 2nd Sep 2011, 17:34, More)
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