» How nerdy are you?

Glazed eyes all round
At last a topic more up my street (the rest have been too exciting or normal I'm afraid). I'm 40, live alone with 3 cats and have more computers under this roof than women I've slept with...

I shan't post too much cos I could be here all night, highlights? I bought a ZX-81 in 1981 with my summer holiday money then spent the next year pulling it apart and learning assembler. Next years money got me a Jupiter Ace and parts to hand build a 16KB rampack (ah the joys of using Forth). My parents got me a BBC B as they decided I had some sort of talent and the prescience to think it might make me a career. I still remember 17 at Uni: a mate and me would take the bus into town then go from shop to shop ripping off their EPROMs to floppy and putting the C64s into infinite loops spewing juvenile filth 8) The bastard had dress sense though and got all the birds.

At 20 I discovered Unix via Tannenbaums Minix, finished my motorbike license and saved enough cash to buy a hard disk. A scant few years later I was a System Admin at a Uni, wrote a MUD and contributed bits to the burgeoning Linux project.

I can't watch a lot of films, I end up shouting at the screen and having to turn it off. Too illogical, too stupid and too wrong - Hollywood, computers do NOT fucking beep constantly or make chugging noises. Arrrgh!

Time to stop, your eyes are going and the smile is starting to crack - after so many years I can actually see the signs now (and know I'm not scoring again). Another drink and flash up a game - Neverwinter Nights 2 - in honour of GG.

/lurk on
(Thu 6th Mar 2008, 22:06, More)

» Guilty Pleasures, part 2

Happiness is a fertile imagination
I'm a fairly tit oriented chap (as are many of us) and as we all know the skill of keeping eye contact is a long and painful learning experience. Working in an office environment means having to be extra vigilant that the eyeballs don't wander too far or you're in for a rep as a perve (or worse, quality time with HR).
So, my guilty pleasure? After a meeting or chat with some lovely lady, having kept eye contact the whole time and just the odd furtive glance at the cleavage while her eyes are elsewhere, it's off to the bogs for a quality shuffle. Pick a fantasy (the old "drunk pickup at the office xmas bash" is a favourite) and with the image (and if you're lucky scent) still fresh in your memory, pull yourself off to a happy end. Back to the desk then, satisfied and relaxed.

Another one that qualifies is lift farts. Rather disgusting I know but so much fun. Mostly only to be enjoyed in empty lifts as you need iron control or mega brass neck to rattle one off in a packed lift. When empty, stand at the back and as you decelerate to the correct floor let it rip. Don't move for a second then slooooowly out the door trying to make sure you don't waft too much with you. Bon Appitite for the next one in...

There's more like imagining kicking the crap out of the bastards who sit and sniff for half an hour in the train rather than use a hanky. Or the undressing game on the train (no direct staring remember, for personal amusement not to unsettle people), pick n mix nipple colours/sizes and pube hair. Tip: stop playing this game well before your stop 8)

The person who had the cats belly smell - I can only agree wholeheartedly. While it's not very macho there are few things that smell better than a clean, warm cats tummy in the sunshine. When they've been in the freshly dried washing is also pretty good though. Get the cat to roll over and bury your face in tummy fur (pick a placid cat ;) ) - warm, live fur is sooooo good.

Edit: Edz314, absolutely right. A guilty pleasure is something personal.
(Sun 16th Mar 2008, 12:18, More)