b3ta.com user redshoes
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» Cringe!

I had just started my current job as a PA and one of the first conversations I had went as follows:

Me: "Hi, I don't suppose you have any records of your travel last year do you? I need to submit them for part of your tax records?"

My Boss: "Actually, yeah - I keep print outs and have them all filed here by my desk, I know - it's a little anal, but I guess it's useful now and then hey?"

Me: "Don't worry, I love anal"

Cue me walking away VERY quickly whilst turning crimson and a quote legacy that will stay in that office forever.
(Thu 27th Nov 2008, 23:45, More)

» Stupid Dares

A friend of mine from back in high school would do anything for a dare! You know the sort... suck on a highlighter, eat a fag, drink some piss and all the other high school frolics...

Anyway, one day - we decided to dare him to drink a bottle of tippex (We'd got bored of attempting to get high by sniffing it NB: this doesn't work and neither does lighter fluid from a lighter)

We didn't even have to give him any money to do any of the things he did - just the words "I dare you to..." would do.

Anyway, rambling over - he drank the while bottle of tippex, turned pretty white and almost immediately we figured it would be a good idea to call an ambulance - he had to have his stomach pumped and he'd caused irrepairable damage to his kidneys.

Still... he never stopped taking on dares. Mighty stupid methinks but he's a living legend.

Still learning..long time lurker... first post!
(Sat 3rd Nov 2007, 15:31, More)

» Tightwads

Friend of a friend
I know it's a bit of a crap story when it's a friend of a friend, but it's the tightest thing I've ever heard of!

A guy in my friend's halls of residence at University charged his girlfriend a percentage of the price of laundering his bedclothes depending upon the percentage of the month she had stayed in his residence!

She's still with him?!
(Fri 24th Oct 2008, 10:54, More)

» Best Films Ever

Everyone else hates them but...
Chopper Chicks in Zombie Town

I don't understand why every one else thinks they're sh*t.
(Tue 22nd Jul 2008, 15:07, More)