b3ta.com user hirsute
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» Pet Peeves

Car fog lights when it's not foggy
You're only supposed to use these when it's FOGGY! I realise that having lots of lights on your coughing old Vauxhall makes you feel like you're flying the Millennium Falcon, but in fact all you're doing is blinding me and making me flash my fog lights back at you. Oh, and they don't make your car go faster, or girls fancy you. They make you look like a dimwit.

And, just to round it off, you'll find a little light on your dashboard that lets you know you've got your fog lights on when it's NOT FLIPPING FOGGY.
(Tue 6th May 2008, 21:33, More)

» Family codes and rituals

Bowel movements
When I was young, any display of fractiousness or misbehaviour was dismissed by Mum with a simple question: "do you need to do a poo?"

This has persisted to the present day, and we're big hairy grownups now.

I've got my own little one and spouse now, and we're saying "it's the morning" to announce a desire to drop the kids off at the pool.

This dates back to a holiday in the Far East when the time zone change led to previously regular daybreak bowel habits to migrate into the middle of the day.
(Mon 24th Nov 2008, 22:07, More)

» Conned

Cardiff NCP
3 hours - 12 quid. Bastards.
(Mon 22nd Oct 2007, 23:20, More)

» Pet Peeves

In shops...
When you hand me my change, I want you to hand me my notes first, so I can grab them with finger and thumb, and AFTERWARDS my coins in the palm of my hand. Then I will get away from your till nice and fast.

If you put my notes in the palm of my hand and pile my coins on top I will have to put down my shopping and use my other hand to sort my fistful out. So I will block your till and annoy you.

Please get it right in future.
(Wed 7th May 2008, 21:04, More)

» Voyeurism

Regents Park
Hot sunny day, weekend, went cycling in the park. Stopped for a breather and read the paper. Many people nearby enjoying picnics, frisbees, kites, etc etc. Noticed about 20 feet away a couple getting friendly. Her on her back, his hand down her jeans, getting faster and faster. After she finished, they got up, kissed and walked away cool as you like. Didn't even wipe his hand!

First post. Cool.
(Sun 14th Oct 2007, 18:16, More)
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