b3ta.com user ninja_kiki_isabella
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» The Dirty Secrets of Your Trade

not exactly a secret, more of a list of guidelines to follow...
I work for a prominent health insurance company in the US; part of my job is to *sigh of dispair* answer phones. I basically provide benefit quotes to Doctor's offices and assist them with any problems they have about the way their claims processed. It's a lot more difficult to hold your tongue and not tell these people to fuck off and die than you would think. So, I came up with a set of common courtesies that I think they should follow (even though NONE of them do):

1) you are all idiots who think you are better than me..........................you're not.
2) billing specialists are the worst. Don't get mad at me b/c you can't bill a fucking medical claim correctly. that's what you took that 2 hr seminar for.
3) don't chew/eat/suck on hard candy/food/gum in my ear. it is rude and makes you sound like the fat cow you are.
4) please do not ask me to repeat myself or speak louder b/c you can't hear me; I am talking loud enough. You need to move to a quieter room or ask those behind you that are laughing about the size of their boyfriend's cock to shut the hell up.
5) do not talk on your cell phone while I am trying to tell you how your sorry ass screwed up the billing on the claim. Listening to you tell your daughter to borrow a tampon from one of her friends is NOT what I get paid to do, and frankly, its not something I want to know about.
6) please don't ask for benefits by saying, "the patient is coming in for a specialist office visit because they have explosive diarreha." simply asking for the benefits for a specialist office visit is all I NEED to know and all I WANT to know.
7) please do not spell your name unless I ask you to. I am more than capable of spelling Cindy, Beth, Amy, and yes, even Susan, on my own....


Here's an actual secret:
When a caller is bitching me out and telling me that I HAVE to take a case and fix the claim, even though I have explained that it was her billing error, and there is no way in hell that I can fix this claim without her refiling it, I take the case. But then the next day I wright a letter to the doctor's office stating the exact same thing I told them on the phone, and close my case. It takes them two weeks to get the letter. Which pisses them off even more, but makes me feel a little better about my shitty job.
(Wed 3rd Oct 2007, 14:37, More)