b3ta.com user British Steel
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Profile for British Steel:
Profile Info:


Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» Family codes and rituals

It's not so much procrastination, more that I tend to put off what I need to do and that I'm oblivious to what's going on around me.
(Tue 25th Nov 2008, 8:25, More)

» Ask B3ta

What happens if he says "My nose is about to grow."

This has been troubling me for a few days now.
(Tue 4th Jun 2013, 4:55, More)

» I don't understand the attraction

I mean, for the love of god WHY!

WHY would you want to run through the woods dressed up as some weak shadow of your favourite mythical hero doing this!?

Is there not some part of your cretinous brain that is screaming "oh hang on a minute, this is FUCKING CRAP!".
(Fri 16th Oct 2009, 12:13, More)

» Celebrities part II

Does anyone else
find that they need to constantly google the names people are dropping in these posts.

I feel so out of touch... =(
(Fri 9th Oct 2009, 9:13, More)

» Family codes and rituals

My Dad
Looking back my father was full of crap which he'd instill into me and my siblings.
Most of his outbursts were either painfully bad jokes (which he would find hilarious) or really strange phrases, some of them I'll never forget.


"The Elephant is a pretty bird, it flits from bough to bough. It makes its nest in rhubarb trees and it whistles like a cow."

"One fine day in the middle of the night, two dead men got up to fight. Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other."

He would repeat these nuggets at the strangest of times, mostly to the amusement of my younger sister.

He would also threaten that I would be sleeping in the shed (he wouldn’t ever be angry when he said this, it would always be out of jest).

Best of all though, and something that he used to do a lot (which I now do CONSTANTLY) is that, whenever you have a guest round for dinner, wait for them to say something along the lines of “Thank you, that was lovely.” then you HAVE to reply with “And at 10 pounds a head it’s not bad either.”

Touching briefly on the bad jokes bit again, he would often tell his jokes with a German accent. He was a fan of allo’ allo! so you can imagine what he sounded like. -_-

My Dad was and still is ace.
(Tue 25th Nov 2008, 5:22, More)
[read all their answers]