» Pubs

Extenuating circumstances
One time I walked straight into a pub's kitchen, picked up a tin of salmon, walked out of the pub and deposited it on a table in the beer garden. I have no idea why but I think alcohol was involved.
(Fri 6th Feb 2009, 17:03, More)

» Protest!

How to render any protest invalid
1. Invite the socialist workers party to print signs and march with you shouting unintelligble crap through bullhorns.

The signs are instantly recognizable and effectively tell standers by that your protest is completely meaningless and has been hijacked by workshy dole scroungers and postgrad humanities students.
(Tue 16th Nov 2010, 20:27, More)

» Money-saving tips

Don't buy branded generics
I wonder what the fuck is going on in the minds of people who buy any of the following:

Domestos / Harpic Bleach
Advil / Nurofen / Panadol pain killers
Hovis bread
Charmin / Andrex toilet paper
Heinz / Batchelors beans
Kellogs cornflakes / frosties / rice crispies or Weetabix
Mazola / Crisp and Dry cooking oil
Schwartz herbs
etc.

The extra money that the branded versions charge pays for advertising, not better quality. In some cases the branded production may cost 2-3x as much as the generic which may as well be money pissed down the drain.
(Sat 12th Nov 2011, 23:41, More)

» Inflated Self-Importance

Boing Boing
Boing Boing is a blog site which covers a raft of topics but is left leaning and has been involved in various political campaigns including of course the "Occupy" movement.

Common with other blog sites they use tags to categorize stories. Here's their "censorship" tag for example:

boingboing.net/tag/censorship

It should come as no surprise then that Boing Boing, moral crusader that it pretends to be, is one of the most censorious sites to be found anywhere on the internet.

If you question the veracity of one of their stories, or perhaps hold a point of view contrary to the prevailing mood you can find your post removed. If not removed, then it might be "disenvowelled" where all the vowels are removed. And if you do this more than a couple of times you get permabanned.

Mind I'm not talking about trolling, or flaming, or anything of that nature. The crime is holding a point of view which the mods don't like. I got permabanned for suggesting a woman got her ass arrested during a Occupy protest because she was interfering with somebody else's arrest. This ran counter to the theme that it was "police brutality" and I was excluded.

Bunch of cowardly self important, hypocritical cunts who can't stand any form of dissent.
(Fri 25th Jan 2013, 10:07, More)

» Crazy People off the Internet

I made money from a nutcase
I made a lot of money from an internet kook. I shan't name this man but I shall relate as much as I can.

This man would post open-ended, vague prophecies to a certain internet forum (well actually lots of forums, but one I happened to be on too). A typical prophecy might be to warn of a "hurricane of death" that would kill "many" without saying when or where or how many. Then he'd wait for a hurricane to kill enough people and dig out this mouldy prophecy and proclaim his own greatness. He had whole shopping lists of similar prophecies.

This man was a narcissist. Like most narcissists they fly into a rage if they don't receive the adulation they believe they are entitled to. All his ghoulish delight in death and disaster just earned him mockery not adulation. So he'd wig out and it was fun to watch. But sometimes he went so far as griefing his detractors in real life, accusing them of being paedophiles to work colleagues, bosses etc. He was a nasty prick in other words.

So any way the guy gets arrested. In the US background checks in one state will reveal if someone is wanted in another state. He was. He had an outstanding warrant for skipping state while on trial for running someone down. He had been convicted in absentia. So he stewed in jail for months awaiting extradition proceedings to happen and after that he enjoyed serving his original sentence plus extra time on top.

Wouldn't you know that another of his hobbies was registering domain names? Most of them were junk but one in particular caught my eye. So as soon as I heard he was arrested I reserved the domain from the hosting company that he used. The company would hold the domain should it ever expire and give me the option of buying. And since he was in jail it did expire, I took ownership and I've owned it ever since.

I bought some hosting for the domain, put some useful content on it to make it attractive and search engine friendly and threw some banner ads in here and there. I reckon must have earned about £15k during the time I've owned it. Not a fortune but a small buffer on top of my regular income.

So I'd like to thank this horrible excuse of a human being. This pathetic smear of dogshit on the sole of humanity. If not for his obnoxious narcissism and felonious past I would not have owned this site and I wouldn't have enjoyed the money from doing so.
(Thu 22nd Nov 2012, 23:22, More)