» Cougars and Sugar Daddies

i am an idiot!
I was 24 and a manager in the local night club(it was not a classy joint). I was on the rebound from a 4 year relationship and feeling low. Now this nightclub really did attract the older lady , but on some occasions they did bring there daughters out. So one night i am standing at the end of the bar watching my staff work when i get a pinch on the backside. Fearing it to be a saggy granny i turn around quick and notice she is not half bad.We end up chatting and before you know it we are in bed at it like rabbits in my tiny loft room. This is where things go wrong!. Around 3am there ia a loud bang on the door and the sound of those silly exhausts that chavs stick on there £200 novas. My flat mate gets up and shouts out the window . He gets a reply back that some one in the house is shaggibg his 17yr old girlfriend!!!! Bloody hell i thought our house was going to get stormed by the local chav scum , so in my very embarrassed state i did the most shameful thing i could ........ yes i phoned the police! i actually dialled 999 and said " There are some hooligns outside my house who wont leave". I never know to this day why i did not just go down stairs and tell him and his shellsuit soverign wearing scum mates to do one. The police arrived and moved them on then came and talked to me while i am in my boxers with some young girl about to leave. i was getting some funny looks of the twunts as well. god i am such an embarassment to the male race!
(Thu 11th Dec 2008, 10:15, More)

» Family codes and rituals

Family rituals
Way back when, it was the law in our house that we could not go downstairs on Xmas day until Mum had made a cup of tea? why? beacuse my parents had not sorted out the presents under the tree yet. I found this out at very young age as i could hear the rustling of presents. I must of been about 5 when I found out santa was not real. The shame.
(Fri 21st Nov 2008, 11:42, More)