b3ta.com user McDazzle
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Cheers to wobbly bloke for this

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» Drugs

First time on mushrooms
Was in halls at uni, pardon the cliché, and it was about 9pm. Group of us took them together and then waited for a while, nothing seemed to be happening. Mate 1 decided to go and get some cigs from Tesco's express round the corner.

Moving on 1hour and he hasn't returned. For the rest of us the drugs had well and truly kicked in, Mate 2 was definitely a foetus on his bean bag and my QOTSA poster was 3D. We all got a bit worried about missing Mate 1 so decided to venture out to find him.

He was in Tesco's staring at a honeydew melon, where he had been for the past hour.
(Thu 16th Sep 2010, 15:07, More)

» "You're doing it wrong"

First job, 17yrs old : Pizza hut likes pizzas delivered from inside the car, not on the roof

(Thu 15th Jul 2010, 21:35, More)

» Cars

Get out of the F*!"*£&ng Car!
Ok, on the way to download festival about 4 years ago (Donnington for the older generation).

Headbanging away to some machine head we go past a fosters tanker, my "mate" thought it would be a great idea to stick a toy gun at the driver and shout pull over, now.. it was clearly a toy gun. it was blue with and had a red cap on the end.

Half an hour later I was pulled over by 7 Police vans with 5 armed officers in each van. With 14 Shields and 21 MP5's shared between them.

I had to sign a declaration to have my toy gun incinerated, that cost me 2 quid! Good start to a messy festival though
(Tue 27th Apr 2010, 14:36, More)

» Unusual talents

I had an important business conversation call whilst on a unicycle (holding a wall mind)
Because that's how professional I get when having to work from home.
(Wed 24th Nov 2010, 22:35, More)

» Doctors, Nurses, Dentists and Hospitals

Sorry for the serious manner but i feel it needs to be said..
It annoys me that so many people slate the NHS. Yes there are problems but there are many brilliant things about it.

My father was diagnosed with a heart murmur in 2003 and was receiving a double heart valve homograph within 24 hours. When things are really bad the NHS stands head and shoulders above other health services. anyways..

On the other hand I current work doing marketing for a dentist who yesterday told a group of mothers that they had all effectively negatively altered their babies facial appearance by not breast feeding them properly. I thought he was going to be lynched! (he practices orthopaedic orthodontics (orthotropics))

(Thu 11th Mar 2010, 12:31, More)
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