b3ta.com user The_Commander_of_Skips
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Profile for The_Commander_of_Skips:
Profile Info:

Plays Rugby Union
Likes Cheese
Listens to music for a job
Mostly comes at night, Mostly

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» Call Centres

Spying Fish
I used to work for Screwfix Direct on the inbound ordering line. It was a nice easy job and I cannot remember a bad customer. All I had to do was to enter the reference number, confirm what the item was and ask for the quantity. Good job for a burnt-out engineering student.

The company used an electoral-roll style of address lookup, all you had to do was enter the address and it would populate the name of the owner/voters registered at the place. One day, a very pleasant sounding lady rang up and asked to register as a customer. I asked for her address first and said "Oh is that Catherine?". She sounded very shocked and asked me how i knew. I was feeling rather cheeky (and a bit strange) and said

"Well, I am not really supposed to tell you. However, I do have a magical flying fish that travels down phonelines. He looked over your shoulder and saw a letter with your name on."

About 1 minute passed by in silence then the customer laughed her head off.

She asked for his name and said that she wanted to speak to him. To which I broke out in laughter and said that it was Bob and that he was hiding behind the monitor in a bad mood due to his secret being let out.

Such a nice lady and she wished Bob a nice day at the end of the call.
(Tue 8th Sep 2009, 21:29, More)

» Irrational Hatred

Facebook Bandwagons
"Remembering Jamie Bulger"
"Baby P, foreva in our hearts"

Foaming grief monkeys!
(Mon 4th Apr 2011, 8:18, More)

» Greed

I am a Traffic Warden.

My old job was made redundant and I have not found anything to replace it yet.

The good parts are that I get paid to walk around the lovely parts of Cambridge and give directions to lost German Tourists.

The bad parts are that I cant play Rugby anymore and that Traffic Wardens dont go to Heaven.

(Fri 15th Apr 2011, 3:05, More)

» Vandalism

I am a real bastard. And thank you, B3ta, for making me realise
Aged 8: I make a catapult out of an old sofa and smash one of the windows in a greenhouse four houses down from our garden.
Aged 10: Destroyed my dad's collection of toy cars. They were not collectors items, just an assortment that he had kept in a toybox and handed to me. I smashed them up with a hammer. (Why, I dont know. I love my dad and thank him for all the work he has put into my life)
Aged 12: Found an box of old LPs on waste land and spent the next 10 mins chucking at a wall whilst singing "Record Breakers".
Aged 23: Pissed on my flatmates' pillows whilst he was away for easter.
(Thu 7th Oct 2010, 19:42, More)

» Anonymous

A Student Pub in Newcastle
For drunken 'shits and giggles', I decided to shit on the closed lid of a toilet.

For 6 years, I have carried that burden of guilt
(Thu 14th Jan 2010, 18:48, More)
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