» Gyms

the swimming pool..
in my ex gym was inhabited by perverts and weirdos,the main two consisted of"the watcher"and "thrasher"(brilliant and well thought of names)now thrasher was generally harmless(his name didnt relate to him thrashing his cock or anything perverse)but his swimming style was very, lets say unique,he would jump into the pool and start a weird type of backward butterfly, twatting poor children and anyone who got in the way of his flaying spassy arm efforts,he seriously looked like he was fitting.
Now watcher was a total first class pervert with an uncanny resembelance to the great aussie cricketer merv hughes,the showers were opposite the sinks and above the sinks where two massive mirrors,so you could, if so inclined, watch yourself showering(not that i did obviously),if you had the unfortunate timing wrong then you got to share the showers with "watcher"(come to think of it i only ever saw him in the showers never in the gym or pool).so after a few minutes you would glance into the mirrors and see"watcher" just staring at you via the huge mirrors.now what do you do in this situation?do you give him the front view or the rear?either way he was going to imagine you being the stick or sponge,so you had to shower sideways and that really wasn`t a winning move either.so i always had the fastest showers humanly possible.
this happened for about six months and i wasn`t the only one to notice it,so being the brave man i was i told the receptionist,she looked a bit uncomfortable and explained that"watcher"was in fact a very unfortunate man who after a car accident had sustained so much brain damage he was effectivly left with the mental age of a 10 year old..
i felt really bad..really bad..not for the fact that i felt sorry for him, but that a 10 year old was checking my cock out was just wrong.
(Fri 10th Jul 2009, 17:28, More)

» Famous people I hate

barry from eastenders.....
not because of the hair plugs...but for not keeping us updated about that girl he should have asked out by now...
(Thu 4th Feb 2010, 14:06, More)

» PE Lessons

2nd year of secondary school..
rugby in january,first thing 9 oclock,ice on the fields,and
sadistic ex failed semi pro rugby players and definatly failed teachers,who whatever the season or weather("footballs for poofs")made us play.
getting changed in the coldest changing rooms in the world was a quick process.
except this day for shaun harris,now shaun was a small guy and the youngest in our year,shaun sat on the bench in the middle of the room topless and looking down at his stomach with a confused look on his face."woke up this morning and all the skins peeling of my stomach"he said as he flaked bits of skin off his puny body.
except this was not "skin" but as any 13 year old boy knows if you dont use the wank sock and leave it to dry then you wake up with wankers psoriasis.
now we all knew this but kept quite and told him he should really see the school nurse as it looked serious and was probably stomach aids or something.
shaun by now was getting worried and asked neanderthal p.e teacher if he could go and see the nurse.
"whats wrong with you boy?"
"all the skin,its peelin of my stomach sir"as he lifted his shirt.
by now we are all in hysterics and neanderthal is looking quizzically at shauns stomach."erm shaun" he said without flinching"have any good dreams last night?"this sent us rolling around laughing,and shaun just looked more confused than ever."come here lad"and neanderthal led him out into the hallway.
after a couple of minutes shaun came back in,with the biggest grin on his face,and i dont think that any amount of piss taking from us was going to remove it either.and rightly so,as you poor woman will never know the boy to man transition that happens when you first(knowingly or not)shoot from your pump action porridge gun.
(Thu 19th Nov 2009, 21:11, More)

» Asking people out

barryfromeastenders
WELL DID YOU ASK HER OUT THEN???
(Sun 13th Dec 2009, 18:01, More)

» I don't understand the attraction

kelly osbourne....
i just love her....why????
(Wed 21st Oct 2009, 20:05, More)