b3ta.com user Bizarrity
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» My computer gave away my secrets

Guide to completely safe surfing
As an IT professional, let me offer some advice on completely guilt-free browsing.

First, download this:
www.vmware.com/download/player/

This is free software which allows you to run a 'virtual computer' inside your own computer. You can get it for Windows or Linux (sorry Mac users, I guess you're all too counter-culture or something).

Then download this:
www.vmware.com/vmtn/vm/browserapp.html
This is a specially optimised version of Linux for COMPLETELY secure browsing. As it's Linux, no Virus, Trojan or other nasty will infect you. As it's a virtual machine, even in the unlikely event something did get on there, it'd never touch your real machine.

There's a very good 'Getting started guide' at www.vmware.com/pdf/bavm_getting_started_100.pdf Take special note of the paragraph at the top of page 4. Doing this will mean that no history of your browsing would ever be saved, as the virtual machine is refreshed every time it is run. This is the way (good) internet cafes work to stop dodgy browsing on a machine from affecting the next person's session.

If you need to save any files, btw, I recommend a USB flash drive. Just virus check it when you've finished with the virtual machine, then deal with it however you want on your normal machine. Maybe burning the contents to CD/DVD and hiding it with your regular jazz mags.

This was a public service announcement. And I didn't even charge a consultancy fee! The fun thing is that VMWare is owned by a massive billion-dollar corporation, and they're actively encouraging your dirty little habits.
(Sat 11th Feb 2006, 22:20, More)

» Hidden Treasure

Six fighter aircraft
Back in 1997, a friend and myself went to stay on his parent's land to help them put in the foundations for a house they were (and still are) building. This land was near RAF Shawbury in Shropshire.

As thanks for digging about two tonnes of earth during the day, my mate and I were given some beers. Once these beers were dispatched, our drunken logic told us it would be a good idea to check out an abandoned aircraft hanger in a field next to the air base. I seem to remember 'the ultimate party venue' came into our minds.

After 'accidently' breaking a padlock with a handy iron bar to effect entry, we realised the hanger was not so abandoned. There were half a dozen fighter planes stood inside, with UN markings on them. I can only assumed they were some mothballed reserve wing.

Realising that this would be laughed at by our mates without proof, we vigorously debated lifting an ejection seat which was lying next to one of the planes. Figuring it to be too big to hide, we settled for a nice piece of piping, which looked like it was made of titanium. My mate's dad saw it the next day and said 'is that off an aircraft? It looks avionic to me?'. Luckily we got away with it, but his perception was uncanny.

I was right about an aircraft hanger being a good place for a party, as it's amazing how cavernous they are inside, especially in the dead of night when you've had a few.
(Sun 3rd Jul 2005, 20:47, More)