b3ta.com user Tedium
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So... yes... a profile type thing.... bear in mind this will be a work in progress for a while... Also bear in mind I'm a physicist and therfore rubbish at writing...

I'm currently a physics student at Oxford (Lady Margaret Hall, so not quite as posh as the rest of the uni). My actual home is in Surrey, but I assure you that despite the above I am actually a normal person, and not some kind of overly posh twat (or at least I don't act like one).
Being a student (and therefore lazy) I'll be on at entirely random times, generally lurking in QOTW, OT, and links, and very occasionally (i.e. once (EDIT: TWICE!)...) putting something badly made on Board.
Despite being a student, I'm generally sensible, which is probably mainly due to not being able to drink massive amounts due to various medications (for physical rather than mental problems). This may explain the lack of good stories for QOTW's so far.
Oh yeh, having just made a totally androgynous profile (even the physics at Oxford bit isn't as gender-unbalanced as you'd think, about 60/40 from a quick scan of the lecture theatre), I'm a bloke, couldn't think of a subtle way to shoehorn it in there

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Best answers to questions:

» Starting something you couldn't finish

I have discovered a truly marvelous proof that it is impossible to separate a cube into two cubes, or a fourth power into two fourth powers, or in general, any power higher than the second into two like powers.
This QOTW post is too small to contain it

Too obscure?
(Fri 25th Jun 2010, 16:06, More)

» Grandparents

My maternal Granddad is amazing
I'm half Polish, and both grandparents on my mothers side were in Poland during the war. My Granddad in German occupied areas (ending up in Warsaw), and my grandmother in Russian occupied areas (now in the Ukraine). My grandmother was deported to Siberia, and she's written a book about it, there are a few copies floating around, and if you ever meet her she'll have sold you one within about 5 minutes.

My granddad has a host of stories, both before, during, and after the war. I'll probably wheel a fair few out over the course of this week.

He was raised in a farm near the German border, and his father had business with them quite often, and as such he spoke German very well, and knew all the formal introductions.

So after the Warsaw Uprising, he was chosen to negotiate the surrender of his group. He walks into the office where the German official is waiting, stands to attention, and gives himself a full formal introduction, complete with titles, for a landowning baron (using the name of the farm, which had since been repossessed by the Germans). The officer taking the surrender, being heavily drilled, instantly salutes, looks embarrassed when he realises what just happened, and the negotiations continue on good terms after that.

He's always very careful to differentiate between the Nazis and the Germans, if they ever captured a German soldier, he would be treated well, since they knew that that meant that they would be treated properly if one of them was captured. The SS were shot.

~~~~~~~~Wavy lines to before the war~~~~~~~~

Him and his brother had quite a rivalry going on, and there's a lot of stories about how they used to get at each other. My great uncle was older, and stronger, but my granddad was cunning, and better prepared.

One particular bone of contention was strawberries, my granddad liked (and still does) to leave them coated in sugar for an hour or so before eating them, so that they absorb all the sugary goodness for when he eats them. his brother used to see this bowl of tempting deliciousness on the side, take it, and eat the lot.

So my granddad decides to discourage him. Next time he gets some strawberries out, he chooses the biggest, plumpest one he can find, hollows it out, and fills the inside with whatever he can find. Paprika, ginger, raw garlic, vinegar, all crushed into a paste, then carefully puts the top back on, making sure that it stays together, and isn't too noticeable. His brother comes along, and as usual, steals this tasty snack, thens spends the next half hour running around screaming that he's been poisoned.
(Fri 3rd Jun 2011, 11:31, More)

» The Dark

I cant go into dark places
I'm scared of being eaten by a grue
(Thu 23rd Jul 2009, 16:20, More)

» Winning

A fete worse than death
My parents are quite heavily involved with the village fete (I tend to find an excuse to be out of the country so I don't get roped in), and one year, when collecting prizes, they were given a rather tasteless serving plate (with sculpted frogs and lily pads on the rim). The guy who gave it to them asked them to not say where it was from, since his wife had bought it and he hated the thing.

(you can see where this is going)

So the day of the fete comes, the raffle is drawn, and a lady comes up to pick her prize.

"Ooh, I got my husband one of these, now he'll have a matching pair!"
(Wed 4th May 2011, 13:04, More)

» Dad stories

Not mine, but a friends
(There are a few about mine, which may come up later...)

A little background: his wife was pregnant with their 2nd child, and the first had been premature, so the early april due date was taken with a pinch of salt. Them and my parents got along very well, and my mum was asked if she could drive them to the hospital when the baby came along.

Unfortunately, he was a well known piss artist, and would make a joke about just about anything.

So my mum gets a call at some ungodly hour in the morning, telling her to get over there as soon as possible, and goes speeding off towards their house, after gathering a few things that might be useful (because she's like that...). Tired, nervous, and breathless, she knocks on the door, only for it to be opened by my friend'd dad who puts on a cheeky grin and shouts "April Fool!", for it was indeed April 1st (though only by an hour or so).

Just as my mum is deciding whether to punch him or storm off, he quickly goes serious "no, it's really happening, and can you tell her family for me, they won't believe me..."
(Thu 25th Nov 2010, 17:56, More)
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