» Bullies

First post... Sorry no funnies, at least this is cathartic.
I went to a private primary school in London. I was not popular neing the only person in my year who did not come from any sort of posh, rich background. I don't know how my parents managed it, I suppose with lots of support from family and friends.

At my school I was not clever. The only subject I had any aptitude for was maths andpossibly science. In year 5+6 I was given extra help with my english because it was so poor. I suppose I did not fit in at school being fat, ugly, dumb and poor. At least the dumb part has changed a little since then. My sister was also in this school two years above me.

My whole school career there was hell. Reception was only small things like peopple nicking something, and throwing it about the playground - the whole year. Tough the only good thing about this time was one girl, we kissed a couple of times, and she was nice to me. Shame she left after that year.

Year one continued with just little interaction towards me. However I do remember one day I was hiding in the toilets at lunch crying. Someone asked why I was there - and threatened to tell my teacher that I wasn't going to go to lunch. So I went as I did not want to get into trouble.

Year two however got a bit worse. I got tied to a drainpe with skipping ropes. Remember this is a private primary school in London. Needless to say eventually a teacher walked past; whom I unburdened my tale to, and who called my dad to say I was upset. Of course no action was taken, I doubt even their parents were told. Also in year 2 were with are head teacher who was talking to us about something, which I cannot remember; then someone called me fat - I was overweight and still am but at a young age - and then more people were calling me fat so I left the room. Yet again, nothing happened.

In year three it was my teacher mainly who bullied me. She would put down my work, say it wasn't good enough. Even though at times I was already staying up untill 10pm or so secretly trying to finish it. She kept me in at break occasionally which was unheard of at my school. This was the only year I ever got on with one of my student bullies whom my teacher also had a dislike of. I suppose we shared a common hatred. One time a swore at my teacher (V not words) and she spotted out of the corner of her eye. She came over and asked me what I had done. I feigned inocence, but seing as I was the dumb one she assumed I was telling the truth.

In year 4 my teacher was nice. I think she had a vauge idea that I wasn't well liked by anyone in the school. So I managed to get to use the kinda crap computers at break time a little more often than others. However whenever I tried to report anything that had happened towards me or the only person who was my friend - two years below me - she told me that she thought I was making it all up. At this point I was already sitting on my own whenever possible, or in corners and away from people. In Art/DT I was already sitting by myself on my own table.

Year five and at this point in the tale something happens. All the comments about me being fat may have reached some teaches ears, and now instead of attending my RE lessons. The PE teacher at my school took me to walk in the park. I suppose this would not count as bullying but I was certianly portrayed as an outcast even more by the school. This year a girl joined who was also not the thinnest but no-one made any comments about her weight.

Year six my teacher is lovely. I remember often frequenting the stairs at breaktime and lunch break as no-one would go there. Also my friend two years below me one lunch break got violence towards her from some of her year, a large part due towards her friendship with me. Needless to say right after I left she stopped being friends with me. In some ways she that felt like the worst kind of bullying. Someone who you've helped protect, and who've you've been kind to you and especially one who is younger turn on you, and end the friendship with you.

Now I move to a state secondary school, where my sister attends two years above me. This school so far has been different. I am now in year 10 and although here I have been bullied somewhat. No-where near as much, I have friends, teachers who believe and support me, and also I now have a therapist whom I see twice a week.

Year seven brought on a different school which I found easy to adapt to. Now because I spoke well, and had a good grasp of the english language (no thanks to primary school, I managed to teach myself some good stuff) and with a fine mannered accent I seemed posh. Let alone the only time I would talk would be correctimg someone or answering a question. I didn't make many friends. I managed to annoy the preps by not joining their group of intelegent idiots, the chavs by being clever, the slow ones for rushing ahead and everyone else for being a bit of a smartarse.

I guess other thigs didn't help. Like when I cried abecause someone had pulled a trick on me when we were playing a game. Or the fact that I had a habit of tidying up the from room every day.

However I was bullied by the chqavs, they would call me things and put me down. Ocasionally I would get shoved a little but not much.

Year eight saw my intellegence growing immensly. I managed to talk a bit more and become friends with the currently unidentified group, alot of which have now turned in to ravers. Also I probably annoyed the slow people less as I was not in most of their classes and I become kind of friends with them. I still got all the verbal abuse as before.

Year nine came with some big changes. I have had problems with people pushing me down small sets of stars and laughing, and such the like. However less direct bullying and more indirect which makes it harder to tell on and try to sort it out. I gt a therapist in year 9 as I was very depressed. I had stopped talking almost completely, even in lessons and to answer questions. I had also started self harming so I suppose even I was bullying myself.

This school year also saw the frequent outbursts I had in lessons shouting at everyone to shut the hell up then my storming out. This even happened once in my most beloved subject maths. A whole bunch of people were talking about me, and I got so pissed off I stormed out.

Year 10 has seen very little bullying with regards to direct, however rumors are more vicious. Also One girl whio would keep asking me stupid questions. Things happen here and there but I mostly keep them to myself.

I would say that some bullies wont sort themselves out. Most have issues and actually need some support. I would personally reccoment talking to a teacher - but not in primary school - as opposed to violence.

P.S. Thanks for a QOTW I can vent about.

Sorry for the lack of funnies.

Edit:

Also have been beten up by chavs ina playground because they did not like my friend, and I got egged by chavs a week ago because I was with her. Though because of her sister I doubt her get that much bullying. (Her sister is a chav and can get them to lay off her a bit. Thats what it seems like anyway)
(Tue 19th May 2009, 18:55, More)

» Impulse buys

Impulse buying
For me there have been a few things.

I brought an exercise bike of gumtree.com for free. I had to pick it up though. Its current useage is for a scrarf stand.

A £125 pair of new rock boots with the springs which have almost fallen apart. I brought them in mid december. :(

A hairclip costing £3.19 which I can't wear because it has rubber in.

My red knitted scraf which I brought of this woman who I used to do some drama stuff with.

A very large selection of books, including one titled "Why we hate US" which is directed at self loathing americans and degrades their society.
(Sat 23rd May 2009, 7:27, More)