b3ta.com user Booce
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Middle aged white male with a love of computers, photography and science fiction. Conforms to all normal Science Fiction fan stereo types and has no dress sense.

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» Amazing Projects

Corporate Mallet
My windows domain at home recently passed its ten year anniversary. I've been running a windows domain controller at home since Windows 2000 days. It's now up to Windows 2008R2.

For many years, it lived under the stairs (like Harry Potter, but more useful and not as horcruxy). These days the ankle biters have left home and it now has its own "comms room". Mrs.Booce even put in a patch panel and hardwired the whole house for 1GB Ethernet.

It hosts the family and friends user accounts, a mail server, a webserver and a full implementation of Citrix running remote applications.
It's my PVR and stores 4 terabytes of movies, TV, music, over a decades' worth of digital photography and home movies. It's also a UPNP server serving multiple different device types (xbox, smartphones etc). It has a VPN and I can access anything on it from anywhere with a net connection. It's also connected to a webcam covering the front door and so acts as a security system too.

It's massive overkill, I've spent many many months working on it over the years, spent thousands of pounds on it and I love it. It's my technological folly.

Much like the golden gate bridge, it'll never be finished, and as it's a Microsoft product, it'll never be perfect either. The ideal project for a man.

Sad, I know, but to me that classes as an incredible project.
(Thu 17th Nov 2011, 17:01, More)

» Drugs

Oramorph and teh fluffeh
My Mum has a broken back and has been on oramorph for many years. This is a woman who can handle her MASSIVE DRUGS. She's completely addicted to it but as the NHS provides, she seems okay with that.

Anyway, her elderly cat was very ill and, being rather tight and on a limited income, my mum decided that it would be better to just load the cat in to the old Honda Accord, hire him a few supermodels for the back seat and give him MASSIVE DRUGS in the form of an OD of her oramorph than to take him to the vet for the "final solution".

Cat gets rounded up and administered with 10 ml through a dropper. Result? Cat sleeps nicely for two hours then wakes up and seems a lot better. However, the next day the cat is back in a sorry state and clearly needs that appointment with the reaper. Cat is once again rounded up and this time administered with 20ml. This time the moggy sleeps all night but still somehow evades the white light.

At this point the fun and games stopped as my Mum fell very ill and was hospitalised. I visited Mum at the hospital and she was desperately worried about her poor cat and asked me to have him put down for her. I then had to take the sick kitty for his last injection and bury him in Mum's garden. The worst part was telling her that I'd done as she'd asked me to on my next visit. She just cried and cried and I felt like a murderer.

Sorry about the lack of funnies toward the end, but the first half makes people laugh when I tell it.

Despite the Honda references this one is actually true.

First post. What have I done!
(Tue 21st Sep 2010, 16:11, More)

» What nonsense did you believe in as a kid?

When I was a kid, I was told that by the year 2000, there would be a colony on the moon. I'd be able to stay in hotels in space for my holidays. Sadly I'm British so even as a kid I knew I could never be an astronaut (is it me or does cosmonaut sound much cooler?) due to our complete lack of anything even close to a space program. Does anyone here even remember Black Arrow?
Still it seemed we'd be out in the wide solar system by the time I was 30. This week, NASA published their space exploration roadmap for the next 25 years. www.nasa.gov/pdf/591067main_GER_2011_small_single.pdf

All I can say is there is a startling lack of space hotels and nothing further than Mars for actual human beings. As a child I used to dream of floating among the stars seeing our planet spinning below me. Of distant worlds with strange life and unfamiliar skies. Looks like I might get to see some priveledged septic plant his flag on Mars in HD or possibly 3D if I'm lucky.

Where's my hyperdrive?
(Tue 24th Jan 2012, 14:32, More)

» Crappy relationships

Genuine Nutter
The last girlfriend before Mrs. Booce tried to stake me through the heart with a kitchen knife, whilst under the delusion that I was a vampire. She was a schizophrenic, which still doesn't explain why I didn't leave then.

That was one of those surreal moments that, despite being instensly stressful, is somehow still funny even as it's happening to you.

She later went on to spray antifreeze in my face, at which point the self preservation kicked in and I got the hell out.

Good times.
(Thu 21st Oct 2010, 15:25, More)

» Stupid Colleagues

Useless IT people
I've worked with IT for over 20 years now. Here are some of the things I've had to put up with from collegues.
A Support Technician who did not know what F1 does (It's the help key).

A Network Specialist who does not know what a subnet is or how to tell a class A from a class B IP range.

A Support Manager who did not know the difference between the internal network and the internet.

An Operations Manager who does not know the difference between a router and a switch.

These are just a few examples of the stupidity of "professional" people who are "highly educated" and work in IT for a living. All very well paid, all clueless.

It's enough to make you want to gnaw your own leg off.

(Thu 3rd Mar 2011, 17:15, More)
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